How to Shave a Head [For Dummies] Chapter 1

"You can't do this, Gracelin, c'mon, seriously! It's your HAIR! It's beautiful, and long, and thousands of girls would KILL to have it!"11

"That's exactly why I'm shaving it off."22

"What-just because it makes you gorgeous?! Why would you want to get rid of something that makes you who, and what, you are; a woman?! Women don't shave their heads! Freaks do! Okay, so Britney Spears did...but she has mental dips sometimes! Do you have mental dips, Gracelin? I THINK NOT!"33

"Are you comparing me to a promiscuous and mentally unstable pop-star?"44

"Oh, c'mon, you know what I mean! People are going to stare at you funny, and think you're..."55

"I'm what?"66

"...Different."77

My best friend's vibrant blue eyes bore into mine, and I could see the confusion of my decision manifesting itself into a guarded expression in her brow. The air was stuffy and smelled thickly of hot steam which wafted from the glass-door shower throughout the large bathroom, and I found myself wondering if the decision I made was a sane one. I had told my mother a half an hour ago that I was going to take a shower and then shave my head afterward, and she hadn't believed me at first. Then, when I had convinced her that I was not joking, she had panicked and called my best friend to come over to our house and talk me out of it. Apparentally my friend had spent the entire half hour it took for me to take a shower sitting outside the bathroom door, waiting to hear the water turn off so that she could pick the lock and bust in.88

Okay...maybe not "bust in". More like "sneak in" when she was sure I had my robe on.99

I sighed heavily, running my fingers through my chestnut-brunette hair in an exhasperated manner, "Jocelyn, it's not such a huge deal-"1010

"Yes it is! Hair is a woman's THING! Guys have abs and women have hair! IT'S THE NATURAL ORDER OF THE WORLD!" Jocelyn begged, dragging her hand down the side of her face in a desperate way, "Don't go against the world!"1111

I took a step back and leaned against the cream-colored bathroom counter, looking down at the ground in thought. I still didn't have all of the reason WHY I wanted to do this straightened out in my head. Finally when I thought I had it figured out, I looked up and explained, "This isn't just because I want attention, or because I want to stand out, J-lyn, it's to show the real beauty of a woman isn't in their hair or make-up or bodies. For far too long, now, it seems that people have been telling women that they're no good just the way they are, and that's not right. We shouldn't need lucious hair, or sexy clothes, or make-up to make us feel good about ourselves. It's wrong to think that way; to think we're never good enough unless we have some type of beauty-enhancer!"1212

J-lyn ground her teeth together and frowned, her light face puckered, obviously trying to think of a good rebuttle.1313

Within a minute of silence, she loosened and sighed defeatedly.1414

"Before you do this, could you at least find someone else that will do it with you so you're not the only one?" She suggested in a depressed manner. Her shoulders sagged as she crossed her arms and stared at me, awaiting an answer.1515

I gave her a crooked smile, "Of course, I would never do this alone. I found someone over the internet. We're going to set a meeting date and place soon, so that we can prove to each other that we actually shaved our heads."1616

Jocelyn reeled, her blue eyes wide in shock, "WHAT!? You're going to meet someone you met over the internet! That's dangerous, Gracelin Elizabethan-Lyonel Andretti! You could be abducted! OR killed! Or raped!"1717

"J. Calm. Down." I soothed, putting my hands up in surrender, "Our parents are coming with us to moot point, don't worry. You could even come, if you wanted."1818

Jocelyn grew defensive, "Do your parents even know about this 'moot point' thing yet? HMMM?"1919

I bit the inside of my cheek nervously, "No...but they'll understand...I think."2020

Jocelyn rolled her eyes, then covered her face with her hands and muttered, "I guess I can't talk you out of it...your mind's already set. God knows that when YOUR mind is set it won't be jostled." She looked up at me and frowned, crossing her arms again, "Well, could you at least wait to shave your head until you actually meet this girl? The same goes for her, too."2121

I smiled triumphantly, "I knew you would understand, Jossy!" I quickly hugged her and twirled her around, to which she opposed and pushed away from me in a disgusted way. Jocelyn wasn't half as touchy-feely as I was.2222

"C'mon, we'd better go tell your cyber-shaver friend that she shouldn't shave her head until you two meet." Jocelyn directed as she turned to leave the bathroom, "And I have to let your mom know that I couldn't talk you out of it. This is just great..."2323

"Thanks, Jocelyn. I love you." I knew she hated it when I said that, but it was true. I loved her like the sister I never had.2424

Her guttural response was a simple, "Eh," as we tromped down the stairs.25