Well may thee put thy heads together in order to slay me,1
these bonds are mine reward for mine years of faith to thee,2
was thy love not inflamed toward me? 3
yet now indignation shines from thine eyes.4
Mine accusers play false against me, 5
they contrive to slay mine innocent soul,6
surely thy heart is not cast in stone,7
as the marble so cold beneath mine feet?8
The judgement seat thy sit upon,9
is it so that mine fate rests on so shallow a foundation?10
cast not thine eyes down I pray thee, 11
but face me and condemn me at the mouth of thy witnesses.12
Mine breath shall expire should you so command,13
yet shall thine heart grieve and shrivel into nothing,14
as mine blood goes back to the ground,15
solely for thy lack of faith.16
Author notes
A poem on "Mariamne" Waterhouse Painting.
I have chosen free verse for this poem.
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Great
I think the message is great and the form is good. I felt like I was reading a bible and the thy's kind of threw off the reading for me. Otherwise a great poem.
DntdKnight
beginning: 5, language: 3, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 3, characters: 5.
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I am pleased you thought my poem worthy of comment LadyEmberRose, I do appreciate it.
~Katie~
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Loved your descriptiveness and style of this. Reminds me of the works of many outstanding older poets from an age that seems so distant now. You did a wonderful job with the words to meet the mood of the picture. Thanks too for adding to my piece. rose
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tanzanite, thank you so much for your comments, always so upbuilding and positive. I do appreciate it very much.
~Katie~
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Katie yo do excel at everything you write. I am soooo impressed with this and I know your poetry will always continue to impress me with the consistent high quality. I loved this a lot and the picture worked well. The submissive words were perfect and does so depict the heart of submission. I think you did an excellent job.
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Bless you Sammy for your wonderful comments on this poem. I did enjoy having another try at this type of write. It doesnt always come off good, however, I am satisfied with what I have done here.
Always and Forever
Your Katie 
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Many thanks Liz for reading my contest poem and for your generous comments. I am pleased you had more than one read of it, this type of write can take some understanding so thank you for your patience.
Hugs
~Katie~
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Mal, thank you for your upbuilding comments, I love having a go at this type of write. This picture did seem to speak to me, so I just wrote what I felt after learning something about the picture for the contest.
Bless you my friend
~Katie~
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Superb!
Superb ... purely superb. You can carry the name, Poet with pride for you have excelled here beyond all my expectations.
Your wording and the period style of writing you have used is beyond reproach. They fit the theme and the picture to perfection.
Again, excellent work, Dear Katie.
Today and Forever
Your
Sammy
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It has been so long since I have read a poem using the old English, I confess I had to read this twice to reacclimate myself. Usually it is done so poorly, I skip to the next piece in the author's list, but you obviously know what you're doing
I'm not familiar with this painting... Your poem has intrigued me, I guess I will have to go look it up now. Good luck, once again! - Liz
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Hi Katie, This is brilliant dear friend . The background truly sets the scene. The words heartrendering ,"mine breath shall expire should you so command" powerful yet submissive. Such a different way for you to write Katie, well done your expertise shines through once more. Mega hugs mal
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