I don't rant well. When I rant I tend to stop making sense somewhere along the way. I get metaphoric, and only I understand the stupidity of those metaphors.
Caged birds, those are huge metaphors for me, those and moonless nights. Wandering aimlessly in search for something that isn't there. Or, is it there and you just can't see it? Or is it there, visible, but in your hurry to search what is to be sought you miss what you are looking for in the first place? Too often we forget what we seek as we are searching, we get lost in the world we wander and forget to keep looking. And so we become lost in our wanderings.
The worthless words we write or say, thinking they have meaning, but, how often do they? I don't always know what I mean, but others are more than willing to tell me. How would they know my meaning if I don't? I suppose I am invisible to them; as readable as a book and as predictable as an old movie.
Caged birds, those are huge metaphors for me, those and moonless nights. Wandering aimlessly in search for something that isn't there. Or, is it there and you just can't see it? Or is it there, visible, but in your hurry to search what is to be sought you miss what you are looking for in the first place? Too often we forget what we seek as we are searching, we get lost in the world we wander and forget to keep looking. And so we become lost in our wanderings.
The worthless words we write or say, thinking they have meaning, but, how often do they? I don't always know what I mean, but others are more than willing to tell me. How would they know my meaning if I don't? I suppose I am invisible to them; as readable as a book and as predictable as an old movie.
Author notes
"This contest was dumb"
I suppose I shouldn't be entering though, not knowing what a rant should looklike when completed.
And the title is wrong, you asked for a rant, not my random ramblings. In the end, I fear, I may have ranted on rants themselves...odd. *shrug*
No matter, what's done is done.
Much adue, and fare thee well.
A contest entry
- Gimme Rants! by Fervent-Author.
125 points, ended January 15, 2008, 14 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Okay, I was fairly impressed until this line: "Or our ramblings." Because here's the thing: I loved the connection between getting lost in search of something intangible and getting lost in search of the point of your writing. But then you had to go and actually SAY the connection, and it was no longer subtle and poetic.
So here's what I would do (please, feel free to not take my advice): I would completely delete that sentence and begin a new paragraph with "The worthless words we write or say". Then, the allegory will remain subtle, and the piece wil lbe easier to read (because it won't be in just one big paragraph).
"I don't always know what I mean[,] but others are more"
"As readable as a book and as predictable as an old movie."
I LOVE this fragment, however, it is only a fragment. If I were you, I would add "I am" to the beginning, just to make it a complete sentence. Also, I BEG you to end the piece with this line. The last two are... completely unneeded, and this phrase is so beautiful. It would be a powerful finish to a powerful piece.
Again, I really like this piece. I can tell it was hurried, but it also has a lot of rawness in it that I really like. Thanks for a nice read.
annye
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I messed around with the final scentence, (now the one you sugested, I tend to be overly apologetic) but I don't know if I used the right punctuation.
^_^ I'm glad you liked the rushed peice, most of them don't turn out 1/2 this well, I know, I've re-read my freewrites *shudders inwardly*
^_^
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A rant about ranting, now THAT is creative!!
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Actually, this is a perfect entry for this contest, a rant is basically rambling, so thank you

~Sorrow




