Anna didn't want to become the owner of his house. Having to face his death was unbearable to her. She could still see his grinning face, those gorgeous green eyes of his, and his favorite saying to her.1
"What's up sugarpie, you comin to see me?"2
"What is it with you?" Anna laughed.3
"The only time you call me or want to see me is at night. I'm starting to think you only want one thing with me." she said teasingly.4
Nathanial laughed seductively.5
"And what if I do?" he purred.6
Chills ran down Anna's back at his seductive voice. Her friends all thought she was freakin nuts, meeting some strange guy at a Goth theater, and then going over to his house at night. They asked why she never saw him during the day, teased her that he was a Vampire. Her best girlfriend Jack thought he was married. Anna rolled her eyes at the thought. When she asked Nathanial about it, he shrugged and raised his eyebrows. "So I like the night. Let me guess, you're friends all think I'm a vampire, right?" he said with a wicked grin.7
Anna burst out laughing at his exact guess. 8
"Maybe. Are you?" She said teasingly.9
Nathanial walked around behind her, and moved her hair out of the way.10
"Would you like me to be?" he whispered seductively in her ear. He pulled her hair back, and bit the side of her throat. Anna moaned at the desire that flooded through her.11
"What about married." she said as she shivered. She looked up behind her to see a flash of sorrow pass through his face.12
"Nathanial?" she asked.13
"No sugarpie, I'm not married." he said quietly, glancing down at her.14
Anna knew from the look on his face, that it was a touchy subject, so she let it go. She also wasn't sure she wanted to know right then what really made him that anguished. And she certainly didn't want to hear about another woman in his life. Especially now.15
The look on his face passed, and the mischevious grin was back. "Any other urban legends we need to get out of the way before I totally ravish you?" He said questioningly.16
"No, I think I'm good," she managed to choak out.17
Sorrow filled Anna as she remembered how Nathanial made her feel. There was something so enigmatic and mysterious how he had lived. The house he owned was filled with luxurious antiques. When Jackie had come by, she was blown away. She was studying antiquities in London, and her mother was a renowned expert in Antiques and artifacts. Jackie had been her best friend for almost four years. She was a tiny petite woman, with chocolate skin, beautiful hazel eyes, and a curly kinky afrro. She looked like Macy Grey.18
"Anna, this is an 18th century Queene Anne desk," she said studying the workmanship. It was a beautiful mahogany desk, with perfect tapered legs, and a rollover on top. "Anna, it's an original! Do you know how much these desks are worth?" Jackie exclaimed as she made her way to the master bathroom.
"Jesus Christ!" she exclaimed as she walked into Nathanial's luxiourious bathroom. Marble and gold decor filled the bathroom. The massive recessed jet stream bathtub had fulfilled many of Anna's fantasies. It was as large as a hot tub. Imported Marble served as the bathroom countertops, with intriquite Mosaics covering the opposite shower stall walls. The showers were almost ten feet high, and a medieval looking insigna graced the front of the shower stall. The room was opulent, masculine, and totally Nathanial. She looked to where Jack was standing. She was studying the stamps on the bottom of the vase. "Anna, I think this is real. I'd need Mom to double check it for me, but I'm almost positive this is an authentic Ming Dynasty Vase! Anna, this Vase is worth..millions maybe? Who the fuck has an anitique Ming Vase next to the Loo? Anna, who WAS this guy?" Jackie asked incredulously.19
"When I asked him what he did for a living he laughed and said he had made his fortune off the dot com business, and that he had been lucky, because his mom was extremely wealthy." Anna said sheepishly.20
"And you bought that load of shit?" Jackie said sardonically.21
"No Jack, I didn't buy it! I'm not stupid." she said defensively.22
"But he made me feel....like I was Aphrodite reincarnated." she said trying not to laugh.23
"Aphrodite? Have you lost your fucking mind?" Jackie said aggravated.24
"No, Jackie, I haven't lost my fucking mind! I mean, honestly let's be completely real here. THe man was fucking drop dead gorgeous, had more money than god, didn't have any diseases, wasn't gay, wasn't married, and I literally had no less than five orgasms every time we had sex. Do you really THINK I gave a FUCK about how he made his money?" She hollered, on the verge of tears.25
Jackie tilted her head, and realization dawned on her.26
"Holy hell, you're in love with him!" she exclaimed.27
"REALLY? YOU THINK?" Anna yelled. Suddenly it hit Anna, that Nathanial wasn't coming back. That it wasn't some prank. She lowered to the floor as the tears flowed.28
"I know I'm crazy," she said in between sobs. "But it doesn't change how I feel, Jack. I miss him so much. I feel him in this house, I walk through the halls and I think I smell him. I wake up thinking I could feel him touching me. I really think Im going crazy," Anna said sobbing.29
A shiver of apprehension ran down Jackie's spine.30
"Anna, what do you mean, you "see" him? Like you wish he was there, or you come around the corner, and you really...like "See" him." Jackie asked her nervously.31
"You promise you won't freak out if I tell you?" Anna asked her.32
"I don't know, I'm starting to get completely creeped out just being here!" Jackie said apprehensively.33
"Last night, I slept here..." Anna started.34
"By yourself? Jackie chastized.35
"Would you shut up and listen?"36
"Ok, sorry." Jackie apologized as she sat down.37
"Anyway, I was sleeping in Nathanial's bed, because when I walked into the room, I just suddenly felt...comforted I guess is the word. I couldn't stop crying, and when I walked in Nathanial's room, suddenly it was like I could feel him in there. So I crawled into his bed, and I fell asleep. And I had this dream where we were at the ocean, and we were laughing," Anna said starting to cry as the memories flooded her. He picked me up and whirled me around until I was dizzy, and I was laughing so hard. And when I looked down, I saw this beautiful gold and ruby ring on the sand. Nathanial picked it up, and placed it on my finger. And he said that whenever I got sad, to think of the ring, and know that he would always be with me." Anna said sobbing.38
"Ok, that's not so creepy," Jackie said soothingly.39
Anna started sobbing uncontrollably. "No, you don't....you don't...understand, Jack.." Anna sobbed out.40
"Anna, what is it? What's wrong, hon?"41
Jackie looked at Anna's face streaked with tears, and her blond hair tangled, hanging past her back. Anna pulled her hand out to show Jackie. And an antique gold and ruby ring shimmered on Anna's hand.42
"Anna, where did you get that?" Jackie said panicking.43
"It was on my hand when I woke up." Anna whispered.
A contest entry
- Come to the Dark Side by UnicornGargoyle.
147 points, ended January 11, 2008, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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P12 'What about married (?)" she said (asked) as she shivered.'
P35 '"By yourself?(") Jackie chastized.'
P38 I wouldn't repeat 'walked in (to) Nathanial's room,...' the first sentence also says something of this.
Nice hook at the end. Hope you have more. There may have been more mistakes but I got caught up in the story.
Brooke
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A few grammar errors and the sentances could use a bit of work. The story kind of jumps from topic to topic without much transitioning. It's an interesting story but it could use a little more detail and the ending is a bit predictable. Needs a bit of tweaking here and there, but good job just the same


