Navy Wife, the Toughest Job In the Navy

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The Lord was creating navy wives and into his sixth day of overtime when the angel appeared and said, "You're having a lot of trouble with this one. What's wrong with the standard model?" And the Lord said "have you read the specs on this order? She has to:
be completely independent, but be sponsored to get on base.
have the quality of both mother and father during the cruise.
be a perfect hostess to 4 or 40.
run on black coffee.
be able to handle the flu and move all her worldly possessions
have a kiss that can cure anything from a child's torn valentine to a husband's weary day.
have the patience of a saint when waiting for the ship to pull in.
have 6 pairs of hands.2

The angel shook her head slowly and said, "6 pairs of hands____no way" But the Lord said, "Don't worry, we'll make other military wives to help. Besides, it's not the hands that are causing the problem. It's the heart that must swell with pride in her husband, sustain the ache of separation, beat soundly when it's to tired to do so and be large enough to understand, when she doesn't, and say 'I love you' regardless."3

"Lord, " said the angel, touching his sleeve gently, "come to bed. Tomarrow______." "I can't," said the Lord. "I'm to close to creating something unique. I already have one that heals herself when she's sick, can feed 3 surprise house guests stuck in the area because of bad weather, and can wave good-bye to her husband from a pier or runway and understand that it is important to the country that he leave." 4

The angel circled the model of the navy wife very slowly. "It's too soft," she sighed. "But tough," said the Lord excitedly. "You can't imagine what this women can do or indure." "Can it think?" asked the angel. "Can it think! It can convert 1400 to 2:00 p.m."5

Finally the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put to much into this model."6

"It's not a leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear."7

"What's it for?"8

"It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness and pride."9

"Your a genius!" cried the angel.10

The Lord looked somber and said. "I didn't put it there."11

___unknown___12

THE TOUGHEST JOB IN THE NAVY13

She stands in the shower, the water caressing her body the way the rain caressed the whole of the out-of-doors, nervous, her stomach churning, every fibre in her body tense, her thoughts running together; " am I ready for this, wish mom and dad could be here, at least I have my sister with me, she loves being a Navy wife, he looks so handsome in his uniform, hope he likes my dress, this dumb hair, why does it always act up whenever I want it to look especially good, now if I can just get my lipstick on strait, wish my hands would quit shaking, there, now just a quick make-up check, Oh God! There's the doorbell, better hurry, don't want to be late for my own wedding."14

They were married in mid-January and like most young couples, their first year was filled with budget planning and re-planning, trying to make a dollar go as far as two, decorating their new home, shopping yard sales for knickknacks, some essentials and an occasional treasure, making new friends, most of whom are also in the Navy, and then the joyful anticipation of becoming parents.15

Living in the shadow of MT Rainier, the ocean on one side , mountains on the other, they spend most of their weekends doing what they both love. Camping and Fishing. Sometimes with friends but mostly just the two of them.16

In the first summer they have a short separation (short as far as the Navy is concerned) when he has to fly to Japan for several weeks. As she says good-bye to him at the airfield, watching his plane disappear into the clouds, she wonders what it will be like, saying good-bye the next time, knowing it will be six to eight months before she sees him again.17

Their joy and pride over the birth of their son, born November 16th, couldn't be marred by the fact that he had received his orders; they would be leaving just before Christmas.18

The next month is a busy time for them, what with a new baby, packing, trying to decide what to keep with them, what to send with the movers. They have to say good-bye to friends who are leaving before them and to friends they will be leaving behind. Find a good home for their little Cocker Spaniel because there will be no room for her in the car. Figure out how to smuggle their two piranhas into California, and finally dividing all her beautiful plants between friends and neighbors.19

Their furniture, beds included, has been taken by the movers so they spend the next three nights with friends and the last three days cleaning their apartment; it has to pass a Navy "white glove" inspection. Friends pitch in and help so it goes quickly and soon there is nothing left to do, no reason to stay any longer. With hugs, handshakes and not a few tears they are on their way. Soon the melancholy of leaving gives way to anticipation.20

As soon as he received his orders he put in a request for base housing. There is almost always a waiting list so having taken a thirty day leave, they spend the holidays at his parents home, a three hour drive from his new duty station, reporting for duty just before he is due to leave on the twenty-fifth of January.21

The month they have together, before he leaves is filled with the hassle of moving their personal things from his parents home to their new house, unpacking the multitude of boxes the moving truck brought, meeting their new neighbors, finding their way around base, getting her a driver's license and just becoming familiar with the area.22

Before they know it January twenty-fifth has arrived. She drives him to the airfield where he boards a Navy plane that will transport him to his waiting aircraft carrier, the USS Enterprise.23

They are silent as they drive the thirty miles to the airfield, their feelings too strong for words. They have gone over everything the day before: where to send her letters to him, how to reach him in an emergency, who to call if she needs immediate help. 24

They cling together in an embrace that will have to last them more then six months; she catches her breath as she chokes back her tears, she promised him she wouldn't cry; one last kiss, one last hug, he looks long and tenderly at his wife and infant son, trying to put an indelible picture in his mind's eye. 25

Holding her baby in her arms, uncontrollable tears running down her cheeks, she watches the plane disappear into the cloudless, blue, January sky. She is alone and on her own now, her only friends, a couple from their last duty station.26

In the beginning she is busy enough making their new house into a home, arranging furniture, pictures a knickknacks. She writes letters almost every night, even when she doesn't feel like writing, trying to keep them cheerful when she doesn't feel cheerful. She tells him about the things their baby, so tiny when he left, is doing; the new teeth, crawling, sitting, standing, walking around furniture, the words he tries to say. She tries to make him feel a part of it without making him feel he is missing it all.27

She takes endless pictures to send him and borrows a video camera to make a tape of them for his Father's Day package. She writes how she misses him but not about the fears and doubts that creep unwillingly into her mind when she hears stories about the high rate of alcoholism, divorces, about cheating wives and husbands during long separations. She writes about their new neighbors; the old ones left right after he did. She won't mention how she misses going out Saturday night or how much she hates being home alone. How afraid she was and how she needed him when their baby was sick and she had to take him to the emergency room in the middle of the night. No she will just write that he is cutting teeth and sometimes he runs a temperature and is a little fussy.28

As the days turn to weeks and the weeks to months she will just write those endless, damnable, cheerful letters.29

The weather, hot and sultry, the baby sleeping, she stands in the shower, nervous, her stomach churning, ever fibre in her body tense, the water soothing and relaxing, her thoughts running together; "I hope he likes my new dress, wonder what it will be like, seeing him again, he'll be amazed when he sees our son, hope he'll say ' da-da', wonder if he'll notice I have lost a few pounds, this dumb hair, should have gotten it cut, wonder if he's changed, wonder if he'll think I have, now if I can just get my lipstick on strait, a quick make-up che.......Oh God! There's the door, he's home."30

Darlene Sperber
August 198731

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