Calvin and Hobbes Christmas Special

Calvin and Hobbes Christmas Special1

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN CALVIN AND HOBBES, OR THE CHARACTERS. BILL WATTERSON IS THE CREATOR OF THE COMIC BOOK SERIES, SO...2

“What are you doing still in bed,” Mom asked as she walked into Calvin’s room.3

“I’ve called you three times! You’re going to miss the bus! Let’s go!”4

“Well, that’s the idea,” Calvin replied without thinking. “I’m staying in bed until Christmas. I want tons of loot this year, and I figure my chance of being good improve greatly if I don’t get up.”5

“Disobeying your mom and missing the bus isn’t good,” Mom replied while putting her hands on her hips.6

“It’s bad.”7

Calvin quickly formed a shocked expression on his face.8

Two minutes later, Calvin started putting on his clothes. “That darn Santa got me every way I turn.”9

It was December 14, and the last day of School before break was tomorrow. Calvin is standing at the bus stop, sulking, waiting for the school bus to come. Hobbes, as usual, was standing next to Calvin. He keeps Calvin company while waiting for the bus.10

“I hate this time of year. “I’ve to be good for two more weeks if I want any goodies this Christmas! I’ll never make it.” Calvin complained. Calvin, as usual, then goes on about the subject.11

“I TRY to be good! I DO! My heart is as pure as driven snow…”12

Hobbes then rolled his eyes and coughed. This made it obvious that Calvin’s heart is not good at all.13

“…It’s just that, well, sometimes events beyond my control conspire against me! I mean, I usually an innocent bystander…WHAT A SECOND!!!” Calvin pointed his right index finger at Hobbes.14

“I saw you rolling you eyes! So, you don’t believe me, eh??”15

“Me???” Hobbes then played the innocent act. He was surprisingly playing it well, but this did not fool Calvin one bit. Calvin then jumped on Hobbes. Then, Hobbes rolled on the sidewalk and quickly bit Calvin on the arm. Pretty soon, they started fighting.16

“BY GOLLY, EACH OF YOUR EYES WILL BE ROLLING TOWARD THE OTHER WHEN I’M THROUGH WITH YOU, YOU HEAR ME?!”17

“HA! I HOPE YOU ASK SANTS FOR SOME CRUTCHES,” Hobbes yelled at Calvin in a threatening voice. Calvin then yelled a little louder. They were still fighting.18

“Miserable miscreant,” While Calvin and Hobbes were rolling on the sidewalk; Calvin hit Calvin in the eyes, which made Hobbes shut his eyes in an instant.19

“Question my integrity, will you?”20

“I can’t QUESTION it until I see some EVIDENCE of it,” Hobbes shot Calvin back as he grabbed Calvin’s head with his left hand. Calvin suddenly jumped out of Hobbes’ grip, as he now realized what he was doing something he SHOULDN’T be doing!21

“AUGHH! I’VE BEEN FIGHTING!!”22

“Only in the loosest sense of the world,” Hobbes said. He dusted himself and stuck out his tongue. Calvin knows that the only way to still be on Santa’s good list was to apologize. So, he looked up at the gray winter sky and shouted:23

“SANTA, HE MADE ME (Hobbes)! I DIDN’T MEAN TO FIGHT!”24

“YES HE DID,” Hobbes also shouted in the sky. “YES HE DID! HE STARTED IT!”25

Pretty soon, they started fighting again. This time, all we see is Hobbes’s tail, Calvin’s hand, and Hobbes’ foot in a huge cloud of dust.26

“I DID NOT!”27

“DID TOO!”28

“DID NOT!”29

“DID TOO!”30

“LIAR!”31

“LIAR!!”32

Five minutes later, they stopped fighting. Surprisingly, it looked like they hadn’t fought at all.33

“Look Hobbes,” Calvin whispered. “No one SAW us fighting, right? This can be OUR little SECRET, ok? Santa doesn’t have to know about this, right?34

“Maybe he does, and maybe he doesn’t,” Hobbes told Calvin as he stuck out his tongue.35

“Ok, ok, I’ll even apologize! I’m sorry. How’s that? See, it’s ok to fight a little bit if you say you’re sorry afterward.”36

“You bit and kicked me,” Hobbes quickly added.37

“Look, I SAID I was sorry! What more do you want?!” Calvin asked. Hobbes thought for almost a minute on what Calvin just said.38

“Well…you could give me all your comic books.”39

“OVER MY DEAD BODY,” Calvin shouted at the top of his lungs.40

“’Dear, Santa,” Hobbes began. “Know what Calvin did today?” Calvin quickly shook his head and began swinging his fist around. 41

“Boy, if it wasn’t so close to Christmas, I’d pound you real good!”42

“Yeah, I’d like to see you try,” Hobbes teased as he once again stuck out his tongue. 43

“Oh no you don’t! You’re not tempting me,” Calvin warned Hobbes. “I want every item on my Christmas list, so I’m going to be GOOD, no matter what the proclamation!”44

As soon as Calvin was done, Hobbes turned his around and pointed.45

“Hey, here comes Susie Derkins.” 46

“Really?” Calvin was so excited. There was snow on the ground; Susie was coming, so why not throw a pine cone at her?47

“Quick, help me find a pine cone I can throw at…” Calvin stopped running towards the pine cone that was on the ground. He then realized what he was supposed to do for Santa.48

“…NO! I’m being good,” Calvin told himself over and over again.49

“Good! Good! Good! Good!”50

“You’ll never make it ‘till Christmas,” Hobbes teased Calvin.51

“Give up now and enjoy yourself.”52

Moments later, Susie Derkins, a girl that is the same age as Calvin walked to the bus stop.53

“Hi, Calvin,” Susie began. It was obvious that she knows Calvin. Calvin even said in one G.R.O.S.S. meeting that she lives three doors down Calvin’s house.54

“Are you bringing your stuffed tiger to school today?”55

“No, he’s just keeping me company while I wait for the school bus.”56

“Oh,” Susie understood. Calvin continued talking.57

“But actually, he’s been noting but trouble today. He’s trying to sabotage my Christmas by making me bad instead of being good. Unfortunately for him, I asked Santa for such great presents that I can withstand any temptation. I’m being an absolute angel.”58

“Well, what did you ask for?”59

“A heat-seeking guided missile,” Calvin replied to Susie excitedly.60

“I figure five minutes with those babies will make up for this whole rotten month!”61

TWO WEEKS LATER…62

After two weeks of being good, it was finally Christmas morning. Calvin and Hobbes were in the living room, about to open the presents.63

“Ha ha! It’s Christmas! HURRY UP, MOM AND DAD, IT’S ALMOST DAWN!” Calvin yelled at the top of his lungs.64

“Here, Hobbes said. He was giving Calvin a present. Calvin was a little shocked that Hobbes would do this for him.65

“You got me a present? Gosh, Hobbes, how thoughtful! Thanks!”66

“I picked it out myself,” Hobbes replied happily. 67

“Open it!”68

Calvin opened the present and was surprised. Quite surprise that Hobbes would give him…69

“Why, it’s…its three cans of…salmon. Um, thanks, Hobbes.”70

“You’re welcome!”71

“Gee, I feel really awful right now,” Calvin said sadly. “I didn’t get you a present.”72

“You know what? I just came up with an idea right now,” Hobbes said.73

“You can give me the present I gave you to ME. That way, it’ll look like you actually gave the present to me.”74

Calvin thought about Hobbes’ idea for a moment before giving Hobbes back the can of salmon.75

“It’s a strange idea, but what the heck…here you go, buddy. Merry Christmas!”76

“Merry Christmas to you, too. This is just what I wanted,” Hobbes said as he grabbed the can of salmon out of Calvin’s salmon. Moments later, Calvin heard Mom’s voice from the kitchen.77

“Calvin, did you knock these cans over in the pantry?”78