Snake died a couple weeks ago. My older brother found him twisted in an awkward position, his neck bent backwards, his head touching his spine. It was an obvious non-living position. Snake wasn't old, but he was probably hungry; my negligence was unintentional and probably inconsequential, but I felt (feel, really) terrible. Though the chance of him having died of hunger is 0+ (that's what we call it in statistics when something is so rare or so small that it basically doesn't exist), I still feel like his untimely death was my fault. I killed him I killed snake I killed my friend I killed him I killed him I killed him.1
But, I digress. I intended to write of the afterlife.2
My views on heaven and hell (or should I refer to them as Heaven and Hell? That's a whole different story, and a whole 'nother argument, I think) are nonexistent (0+). This piece has proven to be hard to write, because I have no opinion on the subject (and a whole lot of non-opinion).3
When snake died, my brother described him as having "shed [his] mortal coil". This is such beautiful figurative language, haunting and impactful, especially since it applies so fittingly to snake's shedding of old skin. But the concept it implies, that snake is somewhere better, is one that neither of us (us being my brother and I) believe.4
We are atheists; we believe in not believing. We believe that once we die, we are dead, and simply cease to exist. We don't go anywhere, don't spend any time "repenting" or "rejoicing".5
There is no heaven, and no hell.6
We simply slumber; our consciousnesses extinguished.7
My brother writes that this makes death harder for us, because it means we have nothing to look forward to and no "next time" to see our deceased loved ones. And he's right, in a way. If I were a Christian, or believed in any sort of afterlife at all (if I were a theist, really), I suppose I would be focusing on the fact that I could spend eternity with snake if I so wish. Maybe (actually, certainly) that's a huge selling point of organized religion.8
Oh, God, I wish I could see snake again, just as I wish I could meet my dead great-grandmother and speak with Aristotle. How I wish I could see all those that have died around me and before me and after me. And oh, God, how I wish I could look forward to an afterlife comparable to Dante's Paradisio.9
But I can't. Hard as I try, as much evidence and pursuasion is shoved in my face, as many times I listen to hymns and see the joy on the face of my sister as she communes with her lord, I cannot be convinced of a higher being. I cannot, at least, for now. 10
And atheism scares me, just because it means I will never experience those wonders.11
But then, at the same time that atheism scares the heck out of me, it's also really reassuring that we will simply die. Because I don't have to worry about an afterlife, I can spend my limited time here on Earth enjoying and improving my life and the lives of those around me, instead of fretting about avoiding hell and pleasing God. I can live my life to its fullest, inspired by the fact that this is the only time I get.12
Similarly, atheism inspires a moral standard in me that I only wish I could truly live up to. (You think atheists have no moral standards? You think that because we are godless, we are therefore heartless? Read, on, please, read on!) 13
Why should I treat others (atheist or not) badly when this is the only time that they get? Why should I make their lives any harder, any more painful, any less of a life, when they are going the same exact place I am (namely, nowhere)? I believe that an atheist's approach to life can be one of the most moral and inspiring, because it is (by far) the briefest.14
Just two weeks ago, I realized suddenly and shockingly what scares me the most in life -- death. But that same realization can inspire me to live my life as only one with a limited time can do: the best I possibly can.15
As I sat on my front porch mourning the loss of snake, my littlest brother attempted to comfort me. 16
"It's okay, Annye," he said, "He's in a better place now. You'll see him later" 17
Well, thank you, Connor, I really do appreciate the sentiment and the effort. 18
But he's not in a better place now. He does not exist anymore; he is in eternal rest.19
And on the off chance (0+) that heaven and hell do exist and snake is now in his own version of paradise, I won't be seeing him there when I die. 20
Because I killed him, and now I'm going to hell. 21
Author notes
I know I know, this is random, and probably more forceful and opinionated than neccessary. But I would REALLY love critical feedback, as I really love this piece.
Thanks so much!
For Contest - The word 'sunshine' brings to mind images of Barney singing, for some reason. Does he have a particularly catchy sunshine song?
A contest entry
- Contest Contest~Round 1 by Ninja Bubble.
175 points, ended February 9, 2008, 17 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Jacks 10th Contest!! by CactusJack.
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Silver trophy winner
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Please critique -- would LOOOOOVE feedback
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Having a snake at home, it made me cringe a tiny bit.
I love the statistics terms thrown in; it added a different and personal touch to it. I was a little stumped that it seemed like the snake died of a broken neck, yet there's commented about hunger. How did the snake actually die? But other than that, it was a good way to blend in personal philosophy.
Great job! -
I have a feeling this story has a split meanign that were the reader can percieve this whatever way they want to...snake could symbolize many things and it is the author who knows what the snake really meant...
It was interesting I will I give you that, caught my attention made me read on and you know you did a good job with it, something to be proud of
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Hmm... I have seen, er, some miracles, and some things that weren't so bleeping miraculous that still led me to believe in higher powers, whether they be God, Zeus, the Easter Bunny, or whatever names you'd wish to apply to them. There is divine power among us. I have seen it, so it's easy to believe in.
I can understand your viewpoint, however, and you make a brilliant case for your school of thought on the matter. this was a great read, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.
Damed sorry about your snake. I'm partial to Ball Pythons, myself...
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Hmm, beautiful
Ha, so, I do have to say that this makes me laugh. Not because of any moral or religious objections I have to your beliefs or anything important like that. But simply becaue the last line of this poem just made me laugh. At first, i thought your whole "i killed him i killed him i killed him" line was a bit, outlandish, considering your writing is beautiful..but at the end it made sense and I chuckled. But on a more important note...your ideas expressed here make a lot of sense. Whether a person is a theist or an atheist, the ideas you present here are something that a lot of people really should take to heart. Whether or not you believe in an afterlife, the idea of cherishing life, and the lives of others would make this life (whether the end or not) so much easier. Brilliant piece. I'm impressed beyond reason. (and to impress me, takes a lot just so you know) beautiful.
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Truely Great
A great narrative piece, it gave me the feeling of sitting down and actually listening to you speak. Kudos on the use of metaphors also, some people find it so hard to execute them so finely. "Snake's shedding of old skin" It is beautiful because it conveys with purpose the conflict stricken to atheists. The thought of life or afterlife without a god. And Im sure you did this on purpose, but i love the internal conflict depicted when athiests use the phrase "God" or even "Jesus Christ" when frustrated. This is a good work, keep em coming.
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Thank you so much for your kind words! I was expecting some harsh critisism for the views in this piece...but you all have been so supportive!
annye
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That was quite thought provoking, and gave me a new view of athiesm. Right now I'm kinda interested in the subject because my parents instilled in me a deep Christianity...you know, Church every Saturday, nothing Friday night or Sabbath afternoon, and I'm kinda starting to have doubts about the whole thing.
Enough of my rambling, it was great, I didn't pick up any grammar problems and the themes and ideas were very thought provoking.
Kudos, and happy 08.
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Well by no means think that I'm trying to convert (or divert) you, but I applaud you for thinking about giving up your religion. Just the fact that you are thinking for yourself, not blindly following what your parents instilled in you, is enough intelligence for me. I like you!!
Hugs!
annye
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I wanna marry this!
I absolutely 100% loved this! I found no mistakes in any area at all! The only thing I found wrong was who was snake? A friend? And actual snake? And how did you kill him? If you elaborated on this with a sequel, im sure it would hit blockbuster status. I would suggest a spotlight for you, but I cant because of anonyminity.
-Keep It Goin'!~Z
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