World of Night, World of Darkness (Part I)

1. The gentle blue hue of the lights flicker off and on. The night has persisted for many hours, yet daylight has not come. The world is dark. Everything, except that blue light. I can’t help but stare at it. It pulsates, the miasmic aura pains my eyes. The wind blows against my back,causing goosebumps to form. There is something about the wind that seems familiar. Something tries to grasp my mind, yet here I am, cold and alone. And naked, in an empty alley in the dark of night with this blue light that struggles to make my sanity fade. The one thing I have left. Sanity. When I think of my experiences, I remember nothing. Where did I come from? What else exists? My mind, blank of events, tells me that I have a past. Have been somewhere before. And where are my garments? How was it that I ended up here naked? I know that I am naked, that must mean something. But, I don’t remember wearing clothing. Many questions and thoughts are entering my mind, but there is nothing to sustain them. With every passing second I feel more and more alone. However, I am not afraid. No, I am at peace here. Not comfortable, but at peace. And the light flickers.1

2. I begin a slow walk. The cement is cold under my feet. Then my eyes fix themselves on a trash receptical ahead. Over the edge I notice clothing, stuffed into the bin. I find myself digging, reaching in for something in which to cover myself. Something in which to warm myself. I find a pair of blue jeans with a large gash on the left leg. I immediately notice blood stained around the gash. As I dress myself with the pants I feel a strong pain. It is deep, moving from my leg to the rest of my body slowly. Then it disappears. It is then I realize that the pain was not physical, but mental. It was all in my mind. But why? I do not remember feeling pain at any other time in my life. The sensation is scary, and I loathe it immediately. I reach in and grab a shirt. It’s a white shirt, blank, stained with blood. It looks as if it has been mostly washed out, but it is still there. Part me wants to put it back, but I feel that I must cover myself. As I pull it over my head I feel another pain in me. A crying pain that rushes through my body for a fraction of a second. I realize it, like the last, is also mental. I cannot help but feel disgusted over the crimson color of the blood on my clothing. I feel sadness for the man who wore this. 2

Then I feel in the bottom, finding boots. They are buried under blank white sheets of paper. They are black,with large straps. I slide them on and begin to walk. The boots are clean, the buckles on the straps are shiny. They look new. I like them. They look good on me. Real good. I walk.3

3. The blue light follows me. It is as if it is alive. It feels alive now, and I feel as if it is watching me. I am feeling self-concious. who’s there? Where am I? Nobody is there. Nobody is around here. where did I come from?4

4. I reach the end of the alleyway in which I was and the world opens up before me. I am in a large city. Before me is a canal, and beyond towers that reach towards the heavens. Upon them blue lights shine. Blue hue reaches around, grasping the city. It looks as if it could go on forever. The hue flickers bright and soft. Bright and soft. I can see the ripples in the canal, a result of the wind that is still blowing. I make my way to the edge of the cement walkway. A cobblestone side street makes its way along the canal, and I cross it. The streets are empty. I then notice there is something in the water. Something strange, something scary. I feel fear as I see it. It’s another man. He is looking at me. I collect myself and realize it is me. My reflection. My heart is still beating hard. The reflection is of a clean shaved man with short black hair. His skin is light, pale white. Tall, not aged, but no longer a child. I look down at my hands and I feel myself go heavy. I hit the pavement. 5

It is still dark when I awake. How much time has passed? I do not know. I realize, though, that this is not a dream. The world is vivid and real. If anything, everything that has existed before has been a dream and this is the awake. I then remember the reflection of myself and feel like I have been introduced to a man that I had forgotten existed. I feel like I have just been born. And somehow I have known eternally that this was me. I am cold.6

5. The wind, if there was really any, is gone now. The air is warm, not humid, not hot, but comfortable. It is still dark. Light is one thing that I remember. But I can't picture light. Light, it would seem, has left this world. 7