Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.1
If I'm with you, I could stay for the whole winter. Just bundled up here, with you. Hunny, it's an ice box out there, but I don't care because you're holding me. 2
The snow outside is perfect and untouched. Why ruin such a splendid thing? 3
"Stay with me."4
"Forever."5
If I'm with you, I could stay for the whole winter. Just bundled up here, with you. Hunny, it's an ice box out there, but I don't care because you're holding me. 2
The snow outside is perfect and untouched. Why ruin such a splendid thing? 3
"Stay with me."4
"Forever."5
Author notes
[[does a boy make a girl feel this way?]] [[wishing i was the girl.]] Baby it's cold outside.
A contest entry
- Ten Minute -or less- Entries (You have ten minutes, don't ya?) by Taylor Renee.
350 points, ended December 15, 2007, 34 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Christmas stories by Elvenfairy.
375 points, ended December 29, 2007, 11 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - ♥...stormy kisses...♥ by always feel pretty.
450 points, ended December 31, 2007, 34 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Under 50, Easy Peasy by OkapiShomapi.
275 points, ended February 28, 2008, 13 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Warm Fireplaces and Comforting Arms by Holey Pastry.
350 points, ended December 19, 2008, 13 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comment! you know you want to. ;)
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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This is cute! It's short and sweet!
Thanks for entering, good luck!
H.P. -
This is really cute! I like the different tones: singsong, then descriptive, then dialogue.
Very nice. I have no critical comments
Thanks and good luck!
annye
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Keep working at your writing!
Your should be you're, but other than that it's short and cute. You could improve the flow a little. If it is somebody speaking, then I would definitly suggest it, but if it is just descriptive then take out 'Honey' and you could scrape through. -
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Thanks for the comment, its very appreciated! Well, the Hunny is there because she is talking about her in fact, 'hunny'. thanks again =)
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this is really good!:] for some reason i really like it even though its so short. lol. i guess because thats how i currentlyl feel about someone so it made me think of him.
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Awwh, im happy for you! hehe, thanks for the comment! it was for a contest, and i like this one
thank you for all the comments.
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sounds like me when I am hanging out at my boy friends house. I just don't want to leave, and the cold is as good an excuse as any to dawdle a bit. Cute story, thanks for enetring my contest.
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Okay
Some good imagery. Remember to double check grammar, (not that I do it very good) and not just rely on spell check. ("your" should have been "you're")
beginning: 3, language: 3, plot: 3, ending: 3, characters: 3.
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aww this is really cute. short but cute. i do think you could add more to this. whether its in the middle you add to it or at the end. there's very lil description and i do believe that is one thing that is relevent to a story. thanks for the cute read
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