"Blood is thicker than water"
the common folk always said,
but to me it doesn't matter
for all I touch soon turns dead1
I'm a blessing and a curse,
that depends on your state,
my visit for the young is worse
whilst the elders cannot wait2
I am the cold wintry kiss
that shuts life out of this world
and it wouldn't be a miss
if you were frightened and all3
I came to bring you the news
that your time is overdone
you must now pay your dues
and let your spirit be gone
A contest entry
- GIVE ME A GREAT STORY!!!!!!!!!! by Infectious Insanity.
210 points, ended December 12, 2007, 13 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Poetry contest by Xtclozer-.
700 points, ended March 9, 2008, 25 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Nice
I like the subject and the first person POV. The rhyming is well done. Bravo.
beginning: 4, language: 5, ending: 5, characters: 5.
-
Simple and catchy. Great use of words, and I loved the rhyming. Abstract in a way ( good way )>
Thanks for entering my contest, and good luck
-
very good. i ilike it.
its simple and well put!
goodluck
*sheep*
Adding your comment:
