Don't you remember when the skies were blue from the flame? I just saw the shades of green and red mix in with the color scheme of the sky. I don't believe, though, that that was the sky. No, that was your eyes. They pondered in my mind as they swimmed around my head. I loved the shade of the pink of the lips that graced your face. I almost felt them on mine as I closed my eyes to imagine it. In a flash, though, the fantasy was real. 1
They were just as good as I though.
Author notes
The Best Damn Thing
I think it is the best, cause it was fresh out of my head. When you think about something sometimes it gives you a flop, but now you can see that the flow from my fingers is awesome. That is definently what I think!
A contest entry
- Ten Minute -or less- Entries (You have ten minutes, don't ya?) by Taylor Renee.
350 points, ended December 15, 2007, 34 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me the Stories Even Tumbleweeds Have Deserted ~_^ by Felissa.
450 points, ended January 8, 2008, 33 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - No comments? by LostSoulOfRage.
675 points, ended December 29, 2007, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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EXTREMELY MOVING!!!
I think that Skies/Eyes was an absolutely beautiful poem. Although the words were elusive and fleeting in meaning, they meant geniunely and deep within my heart. As you explained, I visualized your descriptions. That's how you know whether or not you're really a good writer (if the person reading what you're writing can imagine it themselves). One last thing, you misspelled the word "thought" as the last word of your poem. It says "though".
p.s. I go by the storywrite name "AlmostConfident", my little brother is DrummerboyPianoMan" but for some reason or another i can't seem to leave a message using my name anymore. just thought i'd inform you. -
tnx for entering the contest. this is really good. very deep. i love it. it deff deserves more comments than it has now the discription you wrote was awesome. i really felt the emotion in this peiece.
one thing though. you didnt tell me why you thought this was one of your best in the auother notes. now in order for you to qualify to be a finalist you need to write that in. i will give you until the end of this contest to do it, otherwise you wont get the chance to win.
other than that this peiece is really great. good luck. awesome job and keep it up.
-LostSoul
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I put in the reason.
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Well, now! What an interesting little tidbit to enter into my contest. There's such lovely imagery in it that I'm surprised no one else had anything to say. It's not a normal kind of imagery, though. It has a weird, dark beauty to it...it's unexplainable.
Thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck!
~_^Lumina
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Great!
This definitely WAS beautiful
And deep.
One thing: You might want to look over it again, there's a few grammer crap and all that It could be easily fixed, though! And I'm not gonna let that take anything away from this!
You did very well. It's definitely wonderful and gave me that sweet, welcomed feeling in my stomach.
Nice job, and thank you for being my first entry!
xoxo
-♥-
Tay
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