Vunerable,naked me

Who am I,
but the fool of the god,
wandering moment to moment
for eternity.
Every experience,every tragedy,
oblivion,sink into the abyss.1

An evanescent,
linger into empty halls,
though full with homosapiens.
Lost into modern civilization,
naked,without shield,
without mask,to hide.2

Emancipation,only a dream,
too far to reach.
Salvation had emerged
only through agony and pain.
Life,worthless.
Death,longing.3

Serene beauty of sanctuary, once,
now forbidden city.
Chemicals trying to heal
the destruction from alien disease.
What is the point of fighting,
which promises failure,death.

Author notes

Um,i wrote this one yesterday at allpoetry.Hope you enjoy it,and dont be afraid to be harsh while commenting my piece.

A contest entry

tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Melissa Loves Jeffy
    December 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I already commented this a while back lol. it was on november 19 when you entered my first contest =). I still like this poem and will consider it. Great job and good luck in the contest.


    • fierra
      December 29, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      really? shit! sorry..maybe i'll enter another poem...sorry again! didnt notice..


  • silent dances
    November 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Personally, I liked that one alot, my favorite out of the three I have read so far. It expreses the hopelessnes one feels when there is no hope, even for you to make yourself. atleast thats what I got from it, I'm not sure if thats what you were saying. oh! never mind, I worry to much. Anyway, I liked this alot.

    • fierra
      November 23, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      really? i was worried it doesnt sound good. tahnk you! that really boast me up.I though I suck at writing poetry.Yeah,that pretty much the message of this poem.

  • Melissa Loves Jeffy
    November 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    You misspelled abyss. this is great. I had to look up a few words lol. but to have a big vocabulary is very good when it comes to poetry. You have talent. Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest.


    • fierra
      November 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for reading it! nad thank you for the comment,missy.


  • boxOFjuice
    November 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    O.O I think it's awesome...but really -__-; I'm no poet you should ask someone with more experience to help you ! Nonetheless great job! ^_^

1 - 8 of 8