Cries of a ninja. # 2.
'...pain..' i thought, as i looked at the accusing finger being pointed at me, i honestly didnt like that at all. And not only did i not like it, but since i was a stronger member of the Akatsuki, deidara wasnt as impressed witht this either.
" ....STFU.." i simply said, then turned around. Deidara followed me as a i walked tot he other side of the room yet again. The girl, pain, was quiet. " .....Amaya?" i heard yet, another, different voice say this time. I stopped, and slowly turned my head around, a boring, content expression on my face. As i turned around, a girl with pink hair, and greenish eyes was standing up, looking at me. i just tared at her. "...amaya.... are you here... for the chunin exams?" she asked, in a shy, yet angry voice. I shook my head, not finding it absolutely necissary to ignore her, but.. to ignore the other girl, pain, was necissary. " .....where.. have you been..?" the girl asked, now on the verge of tears. This, oddly, caught my attention. I didnt say anything though, the girl had a few tears leeking down her pale skin. Her hair was short, and on top, was a KOnoha head band. " ...hm?" i siad, wanting her to refraise the question, in a way, i thought she knew me, but.. i didnt know her.. or so.. thats what i thought. " She said... Where did you go?!"" A now, differnet, boy voice spoke in. I turned my attention to him. He had, absolutely, rediculous, blond, sort of spiky hair, blue eues, and an expression on his face, that read. " i'm retarded". i narrowed my eyes at the boy, and at that moment, my blades pulsed again. The message was sent, they were Hungry for blood. I put my hand on the handle of Yami. The intense hunger, sent a chill down my spine, though i was use to it. "
" amaya, is it necissary to waste your breath on these kids, hmm? " Deidara finally spoke in, it was odd, he never acted this content and quiet, just for talking to me in such an annoying way, deidara would have exploded these guys. But, no, he didnt even participate in the conversation, perhaps he knew them?
" well,, you've been awfuly quiet.." i said. The idiotic pyromaniac lookd at me, " sorry, guess ii'm tired?un" he said. I sighed. " whatever... this si boring, where the damn instructor?" I asked no on in genral. And ironicly, just at that moment, The door opened. I took a short, solemn glance to see who it was ,and sure enough.. the instructor for the first part of the exam stood there. He looked like the devil, and... he looked Mean. Deffinetly not the kind of guy to mess around with. " hello everybody! please sit down right now, the first part of the exam will start after the rules are explained!" he yelled in a booming voice. every body started to find seats, I was away from Deidara, and... Our other member for the 3 man squd that was required for this exam and unfortinately... Tobi was being sent here for that other person.. he should be here shortly" i thought, as i sat down beside some freak with white eyes. Deidara sat far away, maybe an unnecissary distance. he sat beside the kid with retarded hair... ' ...idiot..' i thought.\1
( me: i dont remember the rules from the chunin exam// so bare with me...)2
" ok, you magets, here are the rules of the first part of the exam.." the instructor finally said. Every body brought their attention to him, their faces filled with eager detirmination, wanting to know.. wanting to pass. But, the one that stood out the most, i noticed, was that pain girl. Her expression.. was so... so... determin. ' i remember her..' i thought. while frowning.. due to the connection that we use to have. ' was i really like that?' i thought again. ' always happY? i had friends?not saying that i dont have friends now... but... ' " are the rules clear?!" the booming voice of the insturctor broke my thoughts. " yes!" every bod yelled, even deidra.. but i didnt.
" alright, every body ready...." the clock ticked, the room was silent, and... with in that moment.." START!" the instructor yelled, and every body started to skim their papers
i looked, the quiestions seemed really hard... to hard. ' what is with this? do they accually think we can pass sthis? its rediculously hard...' i turned to deidara, he looked as though he was going to die.. the questions were far to hard for him, as they were for me. ' shit... this isnt good...' i thought, as i looked aroun dme, at all of the cheat watchers. ' what do they want us to do?' i thought, then... it hit me. ' are you serious? how are we... or how is deidara... omg..' i thought. though, i stayed absolutely calm. i looked at deidara. and with my mind, sent him a mental message. ' deidara...' i thought,he itnore dm. ' yo retard!' i thought' yelled. that got his attention. ' what?un' he asked, of course, in his mind too. ' listen, they want you to cheat, but try not to get caught... alright? ' i said, ' ... ok..un' he thought. i cut the communication, and startd to think of a way to cheat. ' ... yes.. that will work..' i htought, then did some hand signs under the table so no one would see, ' soul split jutus' i thought. and with that, i felt a part of my soul come out of my body, i gave it my sight so that it could go around and see what other were saying, no one could see the spirit floating around the room but me. it went to a kid, and with its eyses ( my eyes ) it read the paper. I copied what my other half was seeing onto my paper. ' that was too easy..' i looked at my now, finished test. I then activated my mind communication. ' deidara..' i said. ' huh?' he answered. ' i got the answers, did you?' ' no.. what are they?un' I told him the answers to all the test questions, he coppied them. and with that, we were done. i leaned against my chair, and waited, and thought of some things that migh thappen threw the rest of the test.
i sat their, just staring at the ceiling, my face, remaining as emotionless as ever. I brought my thoughts to the past, to when i left this vilage. ' wow.. its been so long..' i thought.
3
4
5
6
i know, it wasnt interesting, but i have to get through the first parts of the exams! # 3 will be out soon, and sorry its short -.-".
7
did you like it?
Comments
-
The beginning of your story is pretty good. One of the few things that irritate me the most is mispellings. You had several that repeated; like "necesssary." Your idea, however, is intrigueing and i would like to read more. Oh, and another thing, something that would improve your writing would be to include some allusions and imaging to your story. I know this is mostly just a dialogue but it will help your story to be more focused and longer. Try to incorporate more ideas/feelings that your main character is feeling. Anyway, great job and hope to read more soon.
Adding your comment:
