Motion to Re-Open

THE HIGHEST COURT
IN AETERNUM 1

ELOHIM
Plaintiff2

vs.3

QAYIN BEN ADAM
Defendant 4

Case No. 00-025


MOTION TO REOPEN
and
ORAL ARGUMENT ON BEHALF OF THE DEFENDANT 6


JUDGMENT DAY PROCEEDINGS
JUDGE EL OLAM: We'll now hear Case Number 00-02, Elohim vs. Qayin ben Adam. Oral argument of Rabbi Yeshua Ha Maschiach on behalf of the Defendant.
RABBI YESHUA: Honorable Supreme Judge El Olam, and may it please the Court: The issue presented by this case is that the right of the Defendant to due process was violated and this having been so, he must be acquitted altogether.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Very interesting, Counsel, but I believe this case was decided when the world began. Reopening it will be a waste of the Court's time and if you take a look around you there are quite a vast number of cases already docketed for The Last Judgement!
RABBI YESHUA: With all due respect, Your Supreme Honor, the Court has all eternity before it, so the question of wasting time is quite academic.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Very well, Counsel. Motion to Reopen is granted.
RABBI YESHUA: Thank you, Your Supreme Honor. Now, the specific points of due process to be examined in this case are the following: a. Right to a fair and public trial conducted in a competent manner, b. Right to an impartial jury, and c. Laws must be written so that a reasonable person can understand what criminal behavior is. To begin, let us review the only extant transcription of the original proceedings as recorded in B'reshit (a/k/a Genesis) Chapter 4, Verses 1-17.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Counsel is advised that the Court knows the transcription by memory.
RABBI YESHUA: No doubt, Your Supreme Honor, but for the benefit of the dead, great and small, here present, standing before The Throne, having no knowledge of the facts, please bear with us.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Proceed.
RABBI YESHUA: We request this text be entered in evidence.
JUDGE EL OLAM: It's my own Word. Granted. Continue.
RABBI YESHUA: The relevant part is as follows:
1 And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said,I have gotten a man from the LORD.
2 And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.
3 And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD.
4 And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering:
5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? And why is thy countenance fallen?
7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? And if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.
8 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.
9 And the LORD said unto Cain, Where is Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: Am I my brother's keeper?
10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother's blood crieth unto me from the ground.
11 And now art thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother's blood from thy hand;
12 When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.
13 And Cain said unto the LORD, My punishment is greater than I can bear.
14 Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, that every one that findeth me shall slay me.
15 And the LORD said unto him, Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the LORD set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.
16 And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.
17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.
The first point I wish to set forth is, that according to verses 9-15, Mr. Qayin Ben Adam was not advised of his due process rights. Secondly, Mr. Ben Adam's right to a fair and public trial was violated. The trial was not public. The Plaintiff merely held a private interview with the Defendant. The third point is that Mr. Qayin Ben Adam's right to a trial by impartial jury was violated, for the transcript clearly shows that the Plaintiff set himself up as prosecutor, judge, and jury. Finally, while the Defendant did cause the demise of his younger sibling, Mr. Havel Ben Adam, no crime was committed "for where there is no law, neither is there transgression".
JUDGE EL OLAM: My Word exactly, as written by Saul of Tarsus. Very well taken, Counsel.
RABBI YESHUA: In addition to what has already been set forth, there are attenuating circumstances that were not taken into account when sentencing my client. Now, in accordance with the rules of due process, the Defendant has the right to be heard in his own defense, and for this reason I wish to call him to the stand so that he may, in his own words, express exactly what, in effect, constitutes these extenuating circumstances.
ARCHANGEL GABRIEL: The Court calls Mr. Qayin Ben Adam to the stand. Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
DEFENDANT: I do.
ARCHANGEL GABRIEL: Please sit down.
RABBI YESHUA: Good eternity, Mr. Ben Adam. Would you please describe your home, childhood, and relations between you and your younger brother for the benefit of the Court?
DEFENDANT: Yes, sir. I was the first born son of Adam and Eve. Everything was fine until my little brother came into the world. From then on, he got the best of everything; he got all the attention, all the praise, all the credit. My parents entirely forgot that I existed, except when something was amiss. Then everything was my fault. I was blamed for every little thing that went wrong.
RABBI YESHUA: And how did you feel about this, Mr. Ben Adam?
DEFENDANT: I felt abandoned, I felt I was being treated unfairly, and I became angry.
RABBI YESHUA: How did your younger sibling behave toward you?
DEFENDANT: Oh, he was a regular "teacher's pet" type, stool-pigeon, brown nose. He had mom and dad wrapped around his little finger. He knew it and took full advantage. Now, in order to cope with this, all through my childhood years and adolescence I just kept to myself and my only hope was to go far, far away when I grew up.
RABBI YESHUA: I see. Now could you please tell the Court what exactly led to the incident described in the text?
DEFENDANT: Well, I became a farmer. I loved tilling the soil and helping plants grow, and in spite of the curse that mom and dad's disobedience had brought down on the Earth, I had ten green fingers. Everything I planted grew healthy and in abundance. Havel was a shepherd and believe me, he smelled like one! He even slept with his sheep... Anyway, the problem was that several times Havel's animals got into my planted field. The first time I had just sown it, so the only problem was that the animals trampled the dirt, making it more difficult for the plants to sprout. I warned him. He said he would see to it. The next time, I caught his animals chewing away at the half grown tender barley grass! So I chased them away quite noisily. The klutzy sheep got scared and unfortunately a lamb got squashed in the process. We had an argument about it, but fair is fair. I had losses and he had losses, so we were even. Now, I wasn't negligent by any means. I even went through the trouble of cutting down quite a number of trees and building a fence to keep those disgusting animals out. Time passed and harvest time came, but for some reason, Havel wasn't watching his beloved sheep again. They pushed and pushed on the fence until it fell over and they got into the field. Oy, vey! They were chomping on the grain like there was no tomorrow! Naturally, I shooed them out, none too gently. I was so angry! You know, by the time I noticed the breach, the sheep had only eaten up about a fourth of the crop, but it was the very best part! As usual, Havel was nowhere to be seen and it was harvest time. There was no time for arguments because if I left my barley in the field too long it would rot, so I decided to settle the matter with him the first chance I got. Then the Sabbath came and so we brought our offerings to God. Like the text says, Havel brought a couple of his fat lambs. I brought my grain offering, but on account of Havel's blessed sheep, all I had was some tired old stuff. We presented our sacrifices and God was so pleased with Havel's plump little lambs but He completely ignored my grain! The very sweat of my brow it was, and He despised it! You bet I was wroth and it showed on my face, as plain as day! Then God comes along asking why I am angry and tells me that I have to get a hold of myself! This was the straw that broke the camel's back. One would think that God would be fair. Being all-knowing, He must have known what had been going on with Havel's sheep! That same afternoon I invited Havel to a picnic under the trees and I decided to settle the problem once and for all. Over his cheese and my wine I confronted him. We had a big argument and he utterly disrespected me, his older brother. Talk about chutzpah! Blinded by rage, I banged his head with a rock until he fell.
RABBI YESHUA: That's all with the witness, Your Supreme Honor.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Thank you, Mr. Ben Adam. You may step down.
RABBI YESHUA: Now I'd like to call Your Supreme Honor as a witness.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Counsel, this is highly irregular!
RABBI YESHUA: Oh, I didn't mean it literally. What I intended to do, Your Supreme Honor, is to bring several events described in your written Word as evidence.
JUDGE EL OLAM. Very well, go on.
RABBI YESHUA: I don't propose to go into these instances in depth, because being set forth in Your Holy Word, I am sure you are entirely familiar with them. I merely wish to call the Court's attention to the fact that undoubtedly there are quite a number of instances throughout the entire Law, Prophets, and Writings, of God being wroth with mankind in general and His Chosen People in particular, incidents where His patience is worn thin, and He takes punitive action, wiping entire populations off the face of the Earth.
JUDGE EL OLAM: I see... Admitted as evidence, Counsel.
RABBI YESHUA: Then there's the issue of the Sentence decreed against my client. Since the entire original proceedings were vitiated on account of the violation of his right to due process and due to the fact that the attenuating circumstances were not taken into account, and ultimately, having demonstrated that the Plaintiff has incurred in similar behavior when He has been wroth against others, I very respectfully pray the Honorable Court may vacate the previous Judgment and restore my client's good name and reputation. Finally, there is the matter of Mr. Ben Adam's exile which caused him to lose his lawful inheritance as first born son and his real property. For this reason, the Plaintiff should be required to furnish restitution in accordance with Talion Law: "an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth", which by analogy would entail field for field and crop for crop, along with a reasonable sum for damages for lost income. To quote B'ereshit 18:25, "Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?” That concludes my pleading, Your Supreme Honor.
JUDGE EL OLAM: Very well, Counsel. Having heard oral argument on behalf of the Defendant Mr. Qayin Ben Adam and having examined the evidence, this Court is ready to issue judgment. The Court deems all the Defendant's requests just and reasonable and therefore, they are granted.
RABBI YESHUA: Thank you, Your Supreme Honor. Justice has indeed been served!
JUDGE EL OLAM: Before Counsel is dismissed, the Court would inquire: What led you to move for the reopening of this case?
RABBI YESHUA: With all due respect, Your Supreme Honor, the answer is quite simple. You see, I am my brother's keeper.7

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