First Line

The sun rose red-gold on the broken fields. Livala stared at the bodies that littered the grass. What have I done? she thought.

Author notes

Possibly a real opening line. Maybe?

A contest entry

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  • Bitter Irony
    November 14, 2007

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    I suggest getting rid of the opening sentence of description; your last two sentences here are a much better hook. I would certainly be interested in reading Livala's story--is she the villain? That would be an interesting beginning. :-)

    Thanks for entering the contest, and good luck!

    ~Bitter Irony