My heart skips when I look at her. My heart, especially, skips when the uncouth garb, which hinders the radiance radiating from her soft and smooth skin, does not shroud her. Her skin feels smoother and softer than the finest silk, embarrassing the worms that work hard to create it. And whenever I put my hands on her...whenever I caress her- with every gorgeous curve- it feels like diving into the deepest gorge. The only thing that keeps me repeating such a dangerous task is the feeling of satisfaction, the satisfaction that is so immense in its magnitude, it makes me dive again and again and again. However, I have been unsuccessful in one thing. I admit I have never even tried to do it. I have never tried to climb the other side of the gradient. I have always wanted to. I was to accomplish it today. But the feeling of meeting the end dawned onto me. The feeling of ending the sensuality was fearsome; far more fearsome than diving again and again and again.2
Her lips. Ripples of joy shoot through my body every time I think of those rosy lips. Her lips. The softness of her lips. The beautiful words that come out through it, such a pleasure to my ears. Even more pleasure to my own lips, when I taste her. When I suck on her tongue, I can taste her. My taste buds cry with joy, and thank me. They thank me to let them have such a wonderful time. They tell me that even the most delicious food that I consume do not satisfy them as much as the taste of her. But I thank them instead. For letting me feel my love. I thank them for letting me enjoy the kiss.3
There she comes. Standing on the bathroom door. Drops of water dripping and being wasted on the floor. Naked she stands. The light from the bathroom has formed a halo around my angel. Her hair, wet and fresh, rests majestically on her shoulders begging for my attention. The blackness of it, her wet and fresh hair, makes me lose my senses. I lose myself and cannot see anything. But I’d rather be lost for the sheer joy of being lost in the beauty of her hair. 4
“Don’t push it back honey.” 5
But she does. And what I see, I cannot describe. 6
Such beauty! Such innocence! Her face is the consummation of all things that make my heart leap with joy in its little cavity. The littleness of which does not allow it to fully express. I quietly thank God for disabling it from doing so. For if it had been otherwise, I would have died from the vigor of my heart’s beat.7
I stare at her breasts. I stare at her hips. Swaying in an undulation that makes me want to jump and grab them, and play with them like a child. But like that child, I am immobile. I cannot move because my senses are lolled by her graciously coy movement, as if she were a doe eager to pluck the first gift of spring. Moreover, the feeling of excitement creeps in every time I see her naked. The excitement which is manifested by the hardness and determination of my penis to graft into her and feel her inner soul. 8
“Someone’s feeling horny!”9
I laugh heartily. 10
Her eyes sparkle in the mildly lit room. I cannot but stare at them. It feels deep as a bottomless abyss, changing at every depth as it draws me into it. Down the continuum, I cannot recognize where I am. The only thing that reassures me is the feeling of her presence, and her love for me that is ever clearer at this great depth. However, the feeling of anticipation still grips my body. The feeling of unfulfilled emotions still lies deep within me.11
I let out a moan. A deep moan of pleasure. I have never been able to predict her, and, yet again, I failed to see it coming. With her body moving like a predator, I couldn’t even react to her swiftness as she grabs my cock and deftly slides it in her mouth. Slowly, and softly, she takes it in. Inch by inch. Tears of joy and raw pleasure form in my eyes as I see it vanish inside her mouth. Overcome by such bliss, I entwine my fingers with her locks, and help her in sliding her soft lips over my cock. The slow suction she creates is almost unbearable. And as I, somewhat, get used to it, she ups her tempo. She sucks at my cock faster; her tongue flickering around the circumference meanwhile. My muscles start to twitch and prepare. I can almost feel the adrenaline being pumped into my blood. My body prepares for the ultimate ecstasy I was so craving for. And then I let it out. A loud moan accompanied by an effusive offloading of the jailed juices. 12
She looks at me.13
“Satisfied?”14
But instead of answering her, I grab her and pull her on top of me. My arms wrapped around her. My legs wrapped around hers. I kiss her. The soft lips partly open to reveal the juicy tongue that so deftly, and elegantly, had pleasured me. I couldn’t but thank it. However, it seemed adamant to admit my tongue inside its lair. So, my tongue had to fight. And what a fight it was! The taste of her!15
Still locked, I start to turn her over and get on top of her. Slowly, I break the kiss. I lick her behind her ear lobe. My hand meanwhile fiddles with her breast. My fingers twisting and twirling her nipples. My love moaning in pleasure. 16
Gradually, my mouth, envious of my fingers, starts to move down her. Kissing her neck and kissing her chest on the way to her hard nipples. As I approach those lovely breasts, the child within me springs to life, and starts to suckle on them as if it was not fed for a day. Sucking, licking and nibbling. With my love moaning in pleasure, I continue doing so. To each breast. 17
“ohhh…”18
I move down further. Continuous. Without breaking the contact of my lips and tongue with her soft and smooth skin. Her legs open, shy and timid to reveal my treasure that she has hidden and taken good care of. I kiss it gently on the lips. I can sense my love’s breathing change. I can feel the same sense of anticipation gripping her. The same feeling, which I had felt when she took me in her mouth, going through her. I slide my tongue inside her vagina. 19
“Ohhh…does my pussy taste good?”20
Again I don’t answer her. But I start to flicker it, and rub it against the walls of her pussy, hoping that she got my answer. My hands, now envious of my tongue and lips, moves down from their work, her breasts, to twitch and twirl her clitoris. The writhe of pleasure encourages me further. Her hands tell me to go deeper. I obey and extend my tongue as far as it can stretch, and press against her open legs. I open my mouth wider and try to consume the whole of my treasure. I start to suck her pussy. And my tongue slithering in and out of it. I can feel her body prepare just as mine did. Then she releases an avalanche threatening my tongue to bury with it. But having conquered her tongue, mine just laps on the juices, not willing to waste the byproduct of her ecstasy, her orgasm.21
“You made me scream like I never had before. And every time I say that!”22
Enthralled by the beauty of my treasure, I didn’t even realize she had screamed. But I was sure my ears did not want my brains to feed on such beautiful stimuli, and kept it all for themselves. However, the thought of her screaming as I lick her made me hard again. 23
She saw that.24
Her lithe body slides beneath mine. Her warm and assuring hands tell me to lie on my back. And her sexy legs transfix me and pin me to the bed. She is on her four limbs, with the elegance and prowess of a lioness.25
“I am going to make you pay for what you did to me”26
Purring, she slowly kisses me. She moves down. Torturing me, playing with me as if I were an easy prey for her. However, I enjoy the sensation. I enjoy the lightning going inside me. 27
She is still moving slowly. Slower than before. Finally, she has reached my eager penis. I gasp in bliss when she kisses my cock and takes it inside her one more time. With a sense of foreboding, I look at her. I look for those eyes that tell me about her love for me. Instead, I meet the eyes of a predator. A predator, that has completely taken over my love. She smiles, and lifts her head to get a clear glimpse of my hard cock.28
“Ready for a thrill ride?”29
Everything that happened in the next couple of seconds, was a blur. She grasps my cock. Teases me at the entrance to heaven. And slides it in with a loud gasp for breath. 30
At that point, I felt like I had crashed from a thousand floors above. My vision blurred. My body feels hot- very hot. My heart thumps against the cage that it is kept captive in. And my arms hold onto her body, for support more than the willingness to feel her in the moment of joy. She lifts her hip slowly, steadily, about half a foot. And, sits again slowly, steadily, with a inaudible thump that only I can feel. She repeats. Each time slower than before; teasing me; playing with her prey.31
However, the animal within me has started to come out of its sleep, and has started to take over my senses. My skin feels red hot. It is smoldering, and could set the bed on fire if I resist the animal. I sit, with her in my lap. And enjoy the thrill ride.32
My hand grips her hips rather strongly. My hands lift her, and my hips start to, rhythmically sway, pushing and pulling my cock against her wet, soft, heavenly pussy. She clasps on to me, standing on her knees, her legs over me. My thighs are underneath her legs, feeling the heat, the ecstasy emanating from her body in the X form we were creating. I fuck her. I push hard. Resonating to my body’s movements, she grinds her pussy against my cock. Her bare breasts push against my naked chest. My heart feeling her heart; her heart feeling mine. My hands feeling her back; her hands feeling mine. My cock feeling her pussy; her pussy feeling my cock.33
I start to fuck her fast and hard. The animals within us make themselves audible. With shrieks, screams and shouts of joy coming from both of us we collapse under the weight of the sensual and erotic moment. She falls on top of me; our hips still grinding at each other, our parts still locked in a fierce dual. 34
Then the animal completely takes over me. My hips move automatically against her. Fucking her. Feeling her inside. Making her moan my name. I feel my orgasm coming. I feel the tension augmenting. Then I release. 35
“Aaahhhh….ahhhhh”36
She lies on top of me. Perfectly still. Her beautiful eyes staring at me, telling me how much she loves me. My eyes stare back at her, telling her how much I love her.37
Author notes
This is the completed "she". Hope you guys like it, and give me loads of comment to build on.
I wanted this one to be more sensual than vulgar. Its a celebration of female body, and how the senses of the persona are jealous of each other for having the chance to do their thing on her. Hope this is brought out in the story.
A contest entry
- EROTIC..... (18+ ONLY!!!!) by parntsoftwins.
100 points, ended January 7, 2008, 7 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - *Turn Me On!* by HopelesslyInLove.
220 points, ended May 13, 2008, 11 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Emotive and Descriptive by tallblondie.
1050 points, ended May 31, 2008, 50 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Steamy Romance by Reaver.
120 points, ended May 27, 2008, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - true Erotica by tiger013.
175 points, ended July 3, 2008, 8 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - 3rd Contest by Tarja.
175 points, ended July 10, 2008, 13 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Make It Sizzle, Make It Hot! by whichcraft.
200 points, ended August 7, 2008, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Did my story do its job? Did it arouse you?
Comments
-
hot
-
Congrats on all the trophies.
You most certainly acheived your goal in wanting to make this a more sensual piece than vulgar. I definitley got that from reading it. This was a fantastic entery and I enjoyed it very much. Thanks so much for entering. Good luck.
-
Excellent

-
great work
ok this was a little hard to read though I think it was just in the way the story was written (view points) but over all was well done. I enjoyed reading it. again you did a wonderful job of describing and a great job of depicting the sex thank you for entering -
BRAVO!~
I enjoyed this. It was very well written and emotionally secure. You did very well with your wording and this almost read more like romance than erotica. There is a very thin line between the two. The wording was what gave it a gentle kick into erotica
. Not vulgar at all in my opinion and very well written. You did very well here. BRAVO!! ~Durian
-
That didn't arouse me, but it was very descriptive. I liked the details even though I could only get through about half (I'm too prude). It was very well written.
-
[4] 'Standing at the bathroom door' not 'Standing on the bathroom door.'
[34] 'duel' not 'dual'
Apart from those two, and only, errors, the piece was expertly written. I loved the descriptions - touch, taste and sight predominated the story. A nice balance of emotional response. This was also one of the better 'erotica' type stories I have read - no over-the-top physical gratuity, and nicely seasoned with appropriate sensual reactions.
Thank you for your entry and good luck!
-
I tried to edit the comment to reflect points but they don't seem to take. We'll try a whole new comment.


-
I'd have to say paragraph 7 was my favorite as it truly illustrates the titanic passion that the heart, tiny as it is, already generates. On the whole, I think that you have tried to elevate the quintessential cliche erotic composition a notch, by exploring the heights and depths of passion and decorating this cliche with well chosen adjectives and similies, etc. At its core, however, it is still the age-old "one man, one woman, in a bed, for one ride" erotic read that we are treated to ever so abundantly here on S.W. Good luck in the contest. I'll be back with points as soon as I earn some. This is my first comment after arriving.
-
You accomplished your theme
It was clearly a tribute to a woman's body, and I certainly agree that the worship is half the erotic sensation.
On your question of "Did it arouse You?"...No. It was certainly descriptive and easy to visualize the act but, any potential for "arousal" was lost [I believe] on the over descriptive conflict of senses. when one gets into a debate over who is most pleasured...taste buds or self, then the focus on the acts of intercourse are dampened.
It was a good write and you obviously have a great mastery of the language but; I would use a little less of to accomplish both the tribute and the eroticism!

beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
-
Ok first I must ask you NOT to rate or comment me back. The first most important rule of my contest is no more than 1000 words. So if you could edit it possibly, to stay in the contest. Second maybe just run it through spell check or re-read it once again, there are quite a few mishaps with word. I read most of it and really enjoy it, just it has to abide by rules in order to win. Thank you.

-
Nicely done! Omg
haha definately aroused me! Well written! The descriptions seems to be flying out and happening In reality as if i was looking at it myself! Especially about the girl being naughty eh haha very interesting write
Woo
nicely done I liked it! Nice job
!

-
That was so believable, I actually thought I was in the room. Very well done!
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.
-
Oh my god sweetie you did an excellent job! You didn't let me down! "did it arouse me?" oh hell yes, that is the most excellent exrotica I have ever read, I don't think it can even be classed as erotica as it has a poetic vibe to it which makes it that even more sensuous, this is wonderful stuff, how powerful it was, you could feel the tension as it built up and now that the writing has a story and a plot it brings it that whole lot more depth and pleasure, the words and way you described it had no vularity to it what so ever, you could feel the love expectionally from the mans side, not the womans so much, but that is understandable due to it being 1st person from the man's prespective, the words and paragraphs flowed amazing well, it flew off the page, making me carry on down and down till I got to the very last bit, feeling the emotions running through the lines as it went!! this was damn brilliant, all it needs is that second paragraph just tidying up alittle and that it is one amazing piece, I am speechless at how full of feeling it had and how you manage to capture such great tension and erotic enchantment in there!! 10/10 and then some! I am really pleased you finished this, this is my favourite yet!! possibly ever when it comes to the art of writing down love making and indeed that superbly was!! well done! x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x


-
I'm all about love not lust and I like how you portrayed love in this story.
This was wonderful.

-
Whisp..!!!!!
Wow..!!! I almost exploded..!!! That was very interesting and passionate...The words came alive inside of me and I mean it got me all heated...very good...very creative...wonderful...Keep up the good writing..I enjoyed..!!!
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.
-
Very nice and sensual. You did a great job!














