Keith wasn’t looking forward to the wrenching that heralded his impending rebound to the present. He only travelled back in time rarely. His black garments blended into the dark of the bedroom rendering him unseen to the couple on the bed. The man’s face held a lazy smile of satiation and the woman’s body sprawled in careless naked abandon. 1
Colin Banks had been the bane of his family’s life. His widowed mother had never stopped bitterly complaining of the wrong this man had done, and how the world would be a better place without him. The casual smirk towards his mother at the funeral had been the last resort. 2
Colin’s congenital heart condition became know to Keith, by accident, in a visit to the local doctor. The tazer Keith held was to be the instrument of his vengeance. He plunged the weapon into Colin’s hairy chest and held it there. Colin spasmed once and lay still. Keith checked for a pulse, he found none.3
The woman’s head turned lazily. “Something’s wrong!” thought Keith as a hazy feeling enveloped him. His last thought before paradox faded him into non-being was “Funny! that woman looks a lot like my mother would have!”4
Author notes
A word count of EXACTLY 200 words (you lazy git! lol
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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lol you too huh? Good film! Thanks for the feedback
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This was ummmmm... Unique. Wen I watched butterfly effect I had to keep pausing cause I swore I kept hearing door bells. Ever since I keep forgetting things and I can't seperate my dreams from reality sometimes. Great write. Good luck in the contest. -
moi? I would never overtly imply anthing about the distaff side of the human race. Would I?
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'the puzzling and incomprehensible behaviour that the female of the species sometimes displays'
What are you implying ?
Kat
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I watched 'The Butterfly effect' last night, so doubtless that affected my thoughts. The real point is not the paradox though. It is the irony that his father wasn't his father and is a moral tale to warn against assumption. Particularly in light of the puzzling and incomprehensible behaviour that the female of the species sometimes displays. Whether it was an affair or a pre-marital fling or more, I left unstated. he he
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Excellent !!!
Great self-contained little story, including all the elements that it should, and a twist at the end!
The old paradox question though...
If Keith goes back in time
and he kills his father,
Keith would never have been born.
He wouldn't have been able to go back in time
and kill his father...
and hense keith WOULD have been born after all!
Nothing changes
Kat xxx -
A twist, for sure. The detail in ths is good and it is obviously well planned. I think this is a winner.
KT
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