Some Of The More 'Less Important' Things About Me

Sometimes I still think about that time when I was 8 when I saw a UFO. It was pretty exciting for me, being 8 and all. After a while I started to think that maybe it was just a plane or something, but it wasn't, because I've seen pictures of the same UFO I saw and it was exact; down to the color of the lights. I also started to read Weird New Jersey when I was 8, it's this magazine they sell in Jersey about the freakish things we have in this state. Like the Jersey Devil and the Pig Lady and all that fun stuff. 1

I was a really smart kid for my age. I read some papers I wrote when I was 8 and 9, I could've easily passed as a genius or a child prodigy or something. I have a knack for writing I guess. 2

I tried to make deals with god also, because I kinda sorta believed but hardly enough and I was very skeptical. Anyway, so I would attempt to pray since I didn't know how, and I would tell him that if he let me have a good week then I'd read 20 pages of the bible on Sunday and pray every morning and night. I never read those 20 pages. I guess it's a stupid kind of deal for you very religious people, but to an agnostic 9 year old it means the world.3

Did you know that I'm the most courageous person I know, but I'm afraid to ride that giant slide at the fair? I'll do anything in the world but that.4

I have my hopes set too high on everything. Like I really only joined this site to make many more friends than I have now, which I haven't really succeeded in doing. 5

I like that hot soup they sell in supermarkets. The kind that they make themselves and it's usually on a stand near the deli. That stuff tastes great, reminds me of November. November reminds me of going to the mall and by the time I get out its 6:00 and dark but I didn't even get anything, so I go to the closest supermarket and buy some ready-made hot soup.6

My cousin showed me a video of a guy getting decapitated in Iraq. I know a lot of people that would throw up and/or pass out from that, actually most people in general would. Kaylee gets disgusted by seeing chicken bones and all, so she would definitely be the one to pass out. I grew up on stuff like that, watching surgery and insanely gory movies, so it didn't really bother me. I don't like that really extreme stuff, like real live slow decapitation, but I don't get all sick over it. My cousins wife said I'm pretty fucked up in the head cuz that stuff never really phased me, but that's how I grew up so that's how I live. I'd rather be a mental fuck-up than a person that passes out every time they see a little blood. 7

It truly is all in the mind, though. I could make myself throw up from it if I wanted to, but that would break my 5 year record that I have going. I never throw up really, I can stop myself just by the way I think of things. It did make me sad though, seeing the guy get killed, the people who sawed his head off said it was "in the name of god". 8

That's another reason I don't believe in god, he says different things to everyone. You go to hell if you lie once in some religions, but in others you get praised and welcomed to heaven if you murder. 9

I've broken 8 or 9 of the 10 Commandments. Some of them I haven't gotten around to breaking yet, but it's naturally in my future. Murder and adultery I think are the 2 I haven't broken. I don't plan on committing murder, but I don't think it only covers murdering humans and I think accidents count.10

I hate it when people try to help me when I don't need or want help, and that's perfectly clear and visible to them, but they do it anyway and expect a 'thank you'. I don't thank anyone that does that. That's one reason why I could be called rude I guess.11

I'm a very lonely person. I don't act like it, but I am. I live a walking distance to a lot of 'friends'. Everyone has that neighborhood friend that they hang out with all the time. Not me, they all say that we should hang out more but they only hang out with me if they're with someone they like more and I just happen to be there. I'm thinking that maybe a lot of people only hang around me cuz they feel bad or something. That doesn't make anything better, though, it only makes me feel worse, and it makes the person complain about how I take up their time. I'd like a real good friend, Kaylee's my best, Bronte is too, but they're always off somewhere doing something so we hardly get to hang out anywhere anymore. I think the rest don't like me much..that's how it seems anyway.12

I'm ashamed of myself I guess. So is my dad, cuz I'm in a honors Lit class instead of an all-state travel team that wins every game for whatever sport he loves most. I'd rather be smart, but it makes me feel terrible to know that my own father thinks I'm a disgrace just because I don't play sports. Don't even leave a comment saying "Oh honey you're dad loves you and he doesn't think of you that way..yadda yadda yadda" But he does, I get it told to my face a lot as a reminder, too. 13

I like to be occupied. I get bored easily. Like I'll chew on the tip of my finger or on a necklace or something. I'll start dancing or I'll make an annoying noise for a while. 14

Those red-hat ladies are strange. I mean you don't get much more strange than that. The Red Hat Society is it? I thought that you must be insane to join it. Bright purple dresses and a BRIGHT red hat. Then I found out that my great aunt is a red hatter. That makes sense though, because my family is generally insane.15

Sometimes I still think that people will call back, especially at 1 in the morning. That's the time when I think they'll call back the most, actually. 16

I love it when people tell me I'm pretty. Not hot or cute or sexy or beautiful or gorgeous, but pretty. That makes me feel great. Most girls wouldn't settle for that, but I'd rather be called pretty than anything else.17

I don't like people that hate everything and complain about everything. Like Lauren, she complains when people swear and tries to control how everyone talks and she insults you so that she feels better about being around you instead of just going away. She also tells you that you're a complete pervert if you mention anything that could possibly be named 'sexual'. She complains about everything, including herself, even though you can tell that she thinks very highly of herself but wants as many compliments as possible. 18

Everyone likes Lauren, though. People don't really absorb her attitude and personality and all I guess, I do.19

I blush for no reason sometimes, maybe its a blood vessel problem, I wonder if anyone thinks it's cute or something, I find it annoying. 20