A couple of weeks before my funeral I had a dream. I was walking naked into a black ocean. It didn't frighten me. I sank deep beneath velvet water and it felt good. I started to let go.1
I guess there comes a point when you grasp that life isn't really life anymore. I knew it. Aidan knew it. And yet, he still held his face away.2
He reminded me of my cat Vincent. Strong instincts devoured with fear. It was like someone whispered quietly in his ear that he was supposed to arch his faith away from me. Away from us. I know it hurt when I held him with my eyes. It scared him. Like he could already see the emptiness that loomed behind hazel dreams. Then sink in so close that it would fill him in when I was gone. 3
But for me it wasn't. There was this overwhelming calm that urged me to watch these moments take hold of him. 4
In our cheap second floor apartment, facing gardens of fake houses sprouting up through the neighborhood, he made a quiet promise to me. At first he gathered me against him like I pictured falling leaves would burrow beneath the rain. In this single moment I couldn't help but watch as he kissed away the streets of my existence. It was strange to really feel the length of Aidan inside of me where his posture stiffened and gave way to easy friction. I decided then and there that days weren't really days. Death isn't really death. Our collections and decisions of life defined only a small part of who we were. 5
There was something hidden in the moments. When we all stood in front of a mirror and never truly seemed satisfied. The way we lay our heads on pillows or gazed longingly out our bedroom windows. The feeling we had when we counted trees on long road trips and wondered why our fathers never visited instead of sending birthday cards. 6
Life fell fluidly, in cool drops of translucent glass, and tore rapidly through my shadowed eyes. My gaze was burning the roots inside of him. I could feel a collapse of understanding shake inward and hold to me. I let his hands do all the talking. 7
Beneath the sheets that we sunk into we rediscovered a passion between us. As I felt myself becoming the wavering line between sex and death Aidan looked at me. We remained attached, a puzzling lock of flesh and fluid. The air spoke for us. Aidan's eyes could finally touch me. A touch more sensitive than his palms.8
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Yes, I suppose my short story does have a feel of that movie, except what I was really writing about has to deal with a terminally ill friend. I wrote this in regards to her feelings and veiws after she found out she was HIV positive. I found inspiration to write this because she has a very different outlook on life. That was all really.
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I like this... intense, powerful piece. I normally don't care for prose format, but this was an exception.
Nicely done, good luck in the contest.
~ Wendy -
This is good! This is very well written! This is very sweet! Keep up the great work!
God bless you,
~~~~~
Erika ~~~~~
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This is a very damn great write. the imagry and everything is fucking awesome. I'm lost for words. Great damn job
~push -
This is beautifully written , and it sounds as if it could really happen like taht , the unintentional distancing from the dying partner ...yet wanting to hold on fiercely to every moment that is still given. I really was able to imagine and feel all this as if it was happening to myself at this moment
Reenie
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Uh, the beginning is way too much like American Beauty. Yeah, way way way to reminiscent
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A sorrow walks here, yet I find a beauty also, in the ponderings of life. Before you died, no one ver really dies, we just journey forwards. I enjoyed reading your short story.
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wow, beautifully written story and a very good storyline, i enjoyed reading it. awesome write, byez!
~Karinn -random person-
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I loved it!!!!! This was a very interesting poem. The description was wonderful. I really found myself lost in your words. And it had a great ending. My favorite line was-
Life fell fluidly in cool drops of translucent glass that tore rapidly through my shadowed eyes.
Awesome job!!!
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