Atomka!!

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In a dimension not of this world are the evilest of Satan's demon's. Atomka is perhaps the most evil. Most of the demons of this dimension cannot pass through to our world. Atomka can pass through any dimension at will at any time he wishes. He devours the souls and bodies of his victims.1

Atomka can appear any size that he chooses. He skin is slimy brown and he smells of rotting flesh. He has fangs to tear the flesh of his victims, horns and blood red eyes. His choice of food is women and children. Placing them in a trance so they can neither move nor scream, he eats them alive beginning at their bellies. Thriving on the fear as well as the pain of his victims, his trance does nothing to relieve their suffering. Instead it intensifies it. 2

Once every seven years he takes a human female and rapes her. His offspring immediately begans to grow inside her and eat its way through her body. Within a matter of 2 or 3 hours it eats its way out of her belly and then procedes to devour the rest of her. The pain is excrutiating. Fortunately, he only reproduces once every seven years. He eats whenever it suits him, but no more than once a day.3

Atomka is indestructable. He materializes out of thin air and can vanish in the same fashion returning to the dimension of the demons of Satan. Atomka captures the souls of his victims and they are forced to experience everything Atomka experiences as he torments and eats his newer victims. The captured souls suffer eternally in Atomka. Atomka seeks only the pure of heart for his victims, innocence is what he thrives on.4

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Mango's of Madness

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1 - 28 of 28
  • creepy dude!

    • Hi!

      Thanks for reading and the applause. I hope you like my monster. I appreciate you dropping by.

      Andy


  • lavanya
    March 5

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    You made me scared Andy...gosh you really have secret door in your mind and believe me i don't wanna go there kidding...very well discribed villan. i simply impressed with your imagination . too good . good luck dear

    • Hi Lavanya!

      Sometimes I like playing on the dark side. In fact, presently, most of my story and novel writing has been dark, crime or horror.

      Thanks for reading, commenting, and all the applause. I appreciate it. I hope you like my monster.

      Andy


  • His.Golden.Eyes
    February 24
    Edit | Reply
    That creeps me out. Definitely a villain.

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      February 24
      Edit | Reply

      Hi!

      Thanks for reading, commenting, and applauding. I appreciate it. Yep, Atomka is one of my better creations.

      Andy


  • Celestial Rose
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    I'm scared now. That's not just creepy-it's intensely creepy!! Ahh!! I really hope our power doesn't go out again-if it does I think I'll scream and hide under the couch. That's just....so....ahhh!! Very good...yet very scary.

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      February 24
      Edit | Reply

      Hi!

      I hope you like the description of Atomka. Atomka is such a sweet thing!

      Thanks for hosting this contest and for reading, commenting, and all applause. I appreciate it.

      May you have many good entries and much fun.

      Andy


  • Olinda
    April 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    like i said. wow.



    the sentences are a bit rushed, but overall this is a pretty good... and dramatic... peice. Great job!


  • Olinda
    April 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wow.

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      April 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks

      Thanks for hosting this contest and for reading. I appreciate it. I hope you like it.

      I also hope that you have many good entries and much fun.

      Andy


  • Anaya Roma
    September 17, 2007

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    VERY CREEPY CREATURE INDEED!

    Even the picture!
    Oh dear...
    You're soooo good, Andy. I will never read any of your horror stuff again. It scares me to death!

    Anaya Roma

    beginning: 5, language: 5, ending: 5.

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 17, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sorry 'bout that.

      You probably should stay away from my horror writing. It's just fiction, but it's not your type of writes. I tried to attribute characteristics of this picture to my monster. Thanks for reading, commenting, and all the applause.

      Andy

  • Honeysuckel
    September 17, 2007

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    Well Damn

    You totally kicked my ass out of the contest. Can you say scarry? Jezz talk about vicious. But really it was awsome

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 17, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks

      Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate it. Becca may like your monster better than mine. I am glad, however; that you feel I've created a good monster.

      Andy


  • gerifitzsimmons Greeters member
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    So much for being 'Good and Innocent'.

    Sometimes I could kick myself for my curiosity. (geri gagging) Okay there went my breakfast—thank you very much!

    Hi Andy, this tale definitely fit the criteria for the contest. I wouldn’t suggest it as a ‘Bedtime’ story (grin).

    If one already questions the power of God in his struggle with the Devil, you may decide them to wager in favor of the evil one’s success.

    The writing is very clear, the plot good and scary, and the lack of actual characters not really noticeable—I think because they are overshadowed by the horror.

    Geri

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, characters: 2.

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Geri

      I'm sorry you lost your breakfast. This is comparatively mild compared with some gore I've read on this site. This is not really intended as a story, just a description. Thanks for reading, commenting, and all the applause.

      Andy


  • EmeraldDreams
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This demon dude is wonderful! I loved this piece! You guys are going to make this contest hard to judge!!! lol

    The way you described him, I swear I actually looked over my shoulder half way through!!!! Certainly creepy, certainly a creature! I think you hit the nail on the head with this one, and how awful that his trance heightens their suffering..... *shudders*

    Great job, thank you for the entry!

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Becca

      Thanks for hosting this contest and for reading and commenting. I appreciate it. This creature just materializes out of thin air. He can be anywhere. He devours body and soul. You wanted great monsters, you should have some. They also suffer eternally from within Atomka. I hope you have many good entries and much fun.

      Andy


  • asthray.heart
    September 15, 2007

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    Lol not a demon I would like to encounter at night time any time soon, double on the part of being a chick :| being raped and eaten is nasty >.>!!

    Great read goodluck lol, nice viscious beast you have created here.

    ~Ebb.

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Ebb

      I'm glad you like my monster. Made him as mean as I could. Thanks for reading, commenting, and all the applause. I really appreciate it. It was nice of you to read my little monster description.

      Andy


  • Midnightmare
    September 15, 2007

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    very interesting! awesome imagery and descriptions. this was very attention-grabbing... lol =]
    i loved reading about your monster... this was indeed very good. good luck in the contest you entered it in!!! =D

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks

      This is really just description and not a story. I'm very glad you love reading about my monster. I hope he goes over well with Becca. Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate it.

      Andy


  • Andrew Timothy
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    It's devlish (pun intended lol). The description of him and how he feads is horrifying. How he has children only intesifies the horror.

    Excellent job on this. Good luck in the contest!

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Andrew

      Thanks for reading, commenting, and all the applause. I appreciate it. Did you enter this contest? This is not a story, but a description. I'm glad that you like it.

      Andy


  • Prodigious.Mirth
    September 15, 2007

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    woot ^6- pretty sweet if you ask the flask { meaning it's god damn awsome} hehe satan- I love reading about Demons and this was a great read ^^ seven years hmmm yummy

    • Andy Stephenson gold member
      September 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks

      Thanks for reading, commenting, and all the applause. This is really just the description of a monster, not a story. It is for a contest. I'm very glad that you like it. I tried to make a really good monster. We'll see how she likes Atomka.

      Andy

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