The two men giggled, bumping one another playfully as they sauntered down the deserted alley.
"You should really come with me later. I've never been in a gay bar before, and I want you to show me the works."
"I can't, sweetie. I told you I have a job tonight," replied the other, vaguely motioning to the gun tucked in the back of his jeans.
"I guess I understand. Soon enough, I'll have someone doing the 'job' for me. Once Barb's gone, we won't have to sneak around at night anymore."
"The offer still stands: If you want me to get her, I can do her for cheap."
"Of course not," chortled the married man. "Who would hire a gay hit man anyway?"
Pulling out his gun, the other replied, "Your wife."
Author notes
rsheafer
Not too pleased with word choice and flow... I couldn't figure out how to keep the concept intact, make it super-short, and keep it flowing at the same time. Dag, yo.
**EDIT**
And.
I mean no offense by the married man saying, "Who would hire a gay hit man?" That statement is actually meant to show what an ass hat he is, and does not reflect my opinion of homosexuality.
Only after submitting the piece did I realize that could come across as douchebag-y.
...Carry on.
A contest entry
- Short and Sweet by abba12.
175 points, ended October 2, 2007, 38 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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thats really well done. its quick and simple but leaves you thinking about it, i had to read it twice hehe! its not the best ive seen, and i agree with your own comments that the flow is out. but the storyline itself is great. good work
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Awwwww awwwwwwwwww
D=
It took me two times to read this and then I was like 'AWWWWWWWWWWWW'
D=
-spazzes-
that was great, hon =]
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