an unwanted marriage chapter 1

I looked at my companion feeling more than a little annoyed. She was a major pain and I was sick of putting up with her. But her parents and my Father and decided that we should be married. So now I was stuck with her. We kept putting off the date, neither of us was in any hurry to be stuck sleeping together. I personally dreaded the honeymoon. What the heck were we supposed to do? Sit in the damn hotel glaring at each other? Take our own separate vacations and ignore each other when we were stuck together at night? And what the heck were we going to do about offspring? The last thing I could EVER see myself doing would be having... no, it was too disgusting and weird to think about.1

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I glared at him, he kept glancing at me. I did NOT want to marry him! I told my sister that and she told me that I was to never tell my parents, it would be dishonoring them to tell them I did not like the husband they had picked out for me. I knew why they had chosen him, he was rich, smart, extremely handsome, but I didn't even KNOW HIM! I think he doesn’t like me; he keeps talking in this voice that suggests that he is merely tolerating me because his Father had ordered him to. Some marriage THIS was going to be! What would happen during the honeymoon? I did NOT want to do IT, but what if he made me? I wrapped my coat more tightly around me, I felt suddenly scared. Marriage meant possession. This boy walking next to me was going to OWN me! He was going to have the right to order me to do whatever he wanted! I did NOT want to do IT with him, EVER!3

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I looked at the man sitting across the table from me. He was soon to be part of my family; his son would be my son in law. We had been friends for years, so it was only natural that our children be married, it would make us family. My daughter would be perfectly happy, after all, Zachary was a fine young man, brilliant mind, loads of money and influence, and he would make a fine husband for my daughter.5

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I sat back and looked at my old friend. Soon his daughter would be my daughter in law. I knew my son must be very happy with her, after all, she was small, beautiful, a bit on the quiet side, but she would make a very fine bride indeed. Yes, my son was a very lucky boy to have such a girl to call his own. But why on earth were those two delaying their marriage? What were they waiting for?7

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I glanced between my husband and his friend. I couldn't help feeling that my Olivia was not happy about our choice in husband for her. She hadn't said anything, but the way those two looked at each other, they barely knew each other after all. That was why I had sent them off to the park, so they would have time to get to know each other, after all, I knew what it was like to be married off to a stranger, and I had never met my husband before our wedding day. It had seemed so odd for me to pledge undying love for a boy I had never met. Plus, they were just children. My Olivia was only sixteen, it was true that she was old enough if she had the consent of her parents which of cores she did, but was she ready for marriage? I wasn't sure. And my husband and his friend seemed so sure that it would be all good. I pained attention as my husband began to talk.9

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When we finally left the park and headed back to the restraint where we were supposed to meet our parents they were waiting for us. "We have made a decision. We are tired of you putting off the date, so since you could not decide on a date, we decided for you. You shall be married tomorrow at noon." My father declared. Beside me Olivia burst into tears. I felt my stomach sink. I hadn’t expected them to do this so soon, I had hoped that if we put it off long enough than maybe the whole thing would be called off. Instead I was stuck getting married the next day! I still hadn't figured out what to do about the whole stupid thing, I did NOT want to marry Olivia, she drove me crazy!11

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I couldn't believe what was happening! How could they do this to me? I was only sixteen for goodness sake! I hadn't even graduated high school, and already I was being married off to some guy I didn't even LIKE! My father thought my tears were of joy, and he chatted very happily as we drive home, all about how everything had been arranged, the wedding, the honeymoon, the house that I was to live in with Zachary, all of it. It was the tradition of our culture, to marry young and live together, to have an arranged marriage, all of it. I HATED it! I did not want to get married, I wanted to finish high school, something I could NOT do if I had children to raise, which I very well may have if HE forced me to...13

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My daughter was overcome with joy. She cried in happiness all night as we made plans. She was so emotional that she didn't stop crying all night, I wondered if she even heard the plans that my wife and I discussed for her future. The happy couple was to fly to Hawaii for a two week honeymoon. While they were gone we'd move all their things into their new home. It was a nice home, four bedrooms, two full bathrooms, a large living room, a patio, a dining room, and all sorts of nice things. My daughter would be so happy, she already was!15

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"But Father, what if we don't get along?" Zachary asked as he watched one of the servants pack his suitcase. "Nonsense! Why on earth wouldn't you get along? She's beautiful, she's smart, and you’re a perfect match!" I said waving my son off. I had a lot to do, I was paying for his new home after all, and I had to make sure everything would be all set while my son was still in med school. "Oh by the way Zachary, I don't know if I've told you this before, but it is... required of you to have your wife have children for you as soon as possible. It would be preferable if you got her pregnant during the honeymoon. That would be the proper way, but if for some reason it doesn’t happen then, you must do it later." I added turning to look at my son. His reaction to that news was not what I had expected.17

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"Honey, it's going to be ok, I promise. Zachary will treat you very well, and you'll only be a few miles away, you can visit us every day." I soothed when my husband left to take a call from his friend. My daughter just looked at me teary eyed. From the other room I heard shouting. "What do you MEAN he doesn’t think he can do it???!!! He has to!!! You tell that boy that he better do IT or he'll have me to answer to! .... Oh, that’s what he said huh? Well, I'll take care of things on my end; you straiten that boy out, and fast!" My husband marched back into the room looking livid. "What is it dear?" I asked though I guessed what the answer was. "Zachary doesn’t think he can DO IT. He says he's never done it before, and he thinks Olivia won't want to." My husband turned to Olivia furiously. "Well? Is he right? Do you not want to fulfill your obligations to your family? Would you shame your family by refusing to bear your husband's children? Answer me!"19

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When Dad got off the phone he brought me into the kitchen, ordered the cook out and shut the door. "Son, I know that you're scared. You've never done this before, and seeing as you never got a chance to meet your mother, I'm sure you fear that Olivia may die giving birth like your mother did. But things have changed son, medicine has advanced by huge amounts. There is nothing to be afraid of, Olivia is perfectly safe." I wondered if I should explained, if I should tell Father that I did not want to Marry Olivia, and definitely did not want to follow the tradition that our culture had about marriage, namely, having as many children as possible. I wondered if I should explain that I just couldn't face doing it with her. But I didn't. It would be a dishonor of my father to appear to be anything less than pleased with his choice in wife for me. So I decided to just pretend that my father had assumed correctly, let him think that it was Mom dying giving birth to me that was scaring me, though I hadn’t even thought about that possibility until now. Great, just another worry to add to the list...21

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"Daddy, I don't WANT to marry him!" I cried. There was a shocked hush in the room, everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at my father and I, wondering what was going to happen next. My father stared at me in silence for several minutes before he finally spoke, in a low voice he only used when he was VERY angry. 23

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"It is not a matter of what you want daughter. It is a matter of tradition and custom. You are sixteen; it is high time you were married. Three of your siblings have been married, and they all get along well with their spouses. Now it is your turn. You WILL marry Zachary tomorrow, and you will be grateful for him. You are his wife, you do as you're told, and if I EVER hears you say something as ridiculous as the words you just spoke May it be in such a time and place where your husband would be well within his rights to punish your ungrateful hide!" I said barely able to contain my anger. If my daughter had said what she just did at any other time I would have given her the spanking of her life, but I didn't do that now. That was for Zachary to do.25

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After an hour of talking to my son he seemed to be reassured that there was nothing to fear. I sent him off to bed and called my friend to tell him what went on. As I was wafting for my friend to come to the phone I felt like kicking myself. Why on earth hadn't I seen this commit? Why hadn't I ever taken the time to think what kind of impact my wife's death would have on my son's views of sex?! No wonder the boy was scared out of his wits! I would be too if my mother had died giving birth, and than I was told that I had to make sure my wife gave birth as soon as possible! When my friend came to the phone I explained what had been the problem, and I suggested that Olivia might be afraid of the same thing. My friend had seemed angry when he came to the phone, but when I told him about my conversation with Zachary he became thoughtful.27

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My husband got off the phone and studied Olivia shrewdly. "Are you afraid of giving birth? Is that what the problem is, you're afraid of giving birth?" he asked. Olivia immediately seized the escape rout being offered to her, and my husband spent the next hour convincing Olivia that there was nothing to fear. I joined in, knowing that she would feel better if she got the assurance of women. Maybe that is what the problem was; maybe she was just afraid of sex. But it just didn't seem quite right to me. I couldn't help feeling that there was more.