tom

Ripped from it painful bed where it had been buried deep, all the feeling and memories arose. They were stronger this time, stronger braver and they hurt more then ever. She had spent so long preparing for this moment the moment when she would have to see him again. All this preparation was no help now these feelings were too strong and over whelming no set routine would work. She felt the tears swell up from deep in side her as he ran towards her friends. Fear and panic grasped her she did not know what to do how to handle this. Every second he was getting closer she was running out of time to decide. These tears were too much she did what she had told herself she would not do she walked straight past, ignored him. As soon as she passed him the dam burst and each tear she had buried every emotion that had been so carefully hidden attempted to escape through the tiny opening in her strong wall she had built to protect herself. All she wanted to do was crumble into a ball and cry but she couldn’t. She couldn’t let him see she was hurting she couldn’t give him the pleasure. She was closely followed by her friends all wondering what was going on. She was bombarded with questions and hugs. She brought her tears to an abrupt stop. She was not going to let this bother her who the hell does he think he is? He can’t upset me? She said to herself. The rest of her walk was a bit of a blur she couldn’t listen to her friends she couldn’t listen to herself she just dozed and wandered along. When she got back he was still there. It was silly but she had hope that he would have left or that she had dreamt he was there. But no he was still there and he seemed to be completely fine. She shook it off and tried her best to be as normal as she could. She was sitting with her friends but she could not join the conversation each time she tried to speak the tears choked her. They were determined to escape. Finally she could not hold them in any longer. She was luck to have a friendly shoulder to support her but it wasn’t enough there was something missing and that’s what she was crying for. She cried till she felt stupid how could she cry over a guy? It was pathetic