Dear Lucas

Lucas Ryder
677 County Rd. 7
ON, CA
L0V 3U0

DATE: Too long, but is it too late?
*******
Dear Luke,
This is the truth and nothing but the truth. That much I promise you.

We spent two months together on that island, and though it seemed like we were alone, we were with Adraina, David, Kanti and Max too. Isn't it funny, how life works out sometimes? I mean, I never thought...I never dreamed...well, I'm dating David now, Luke.

You've got to understand though, if you give me another chance, I wouldn't think another thought about David. He and I, we get along great. Don't get me wrong, he's a really terrific guy and I love him to death--just not like that. I love him like a friend, a brother almost. We've been hanging out a lot lately, since his personal jet allows him to take him wherever he wants. But when he's here, it isn't where he wants to be.

And it isn't me he wants, Luke. He wants Rain. I can just tell. He gets all moody when I mention her, and jealous when I mention you. Needless to say, he gets jealous a lot these days. Actually, I think I've gotten him to the point where he's actually quite pissed at me. Which, personally, I don't mind.

I'm breaking up with him next Saturday, his next visit. I don't know if I prefer pissed-off David who will shrug off the break-up or if I prefer happy David who will walk away with the biggest grin on his face. Either way, I know I feel slightly horrified at how he reacts--even though I totally expect it.

Lucas, if you don't forgive me...well, then I'll never be able to forgive myself. I want you to forgive me, I need you to forgive me. I didn't mean to pick the wrong guy. But you gave me an ultimatum, you or him. I had to pick him, Lucas. You, of all people, know that I hate to be stuck in the middle. I hate it. But I choose the wrong choice. Obvisiously. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing this and I wouldn't be planning on breaking up with my first, real boyfriend.

I'm not writing to you because I'm breaking up with David and just want you back all of a sudden. It wasn't even a well-thought out thing. I just knew from the moment I choose David, from the moment I even considered it, it was the wrong choice. Here's the thing, not only did I lose the love of my life (you) when I chose David but I also lost my best friend (Rain, whom I now realize is one-hundred percent in love with David. How I didn't see it--I don't know.) And now, not only am I about to lose David as well, Kanti and Max have been ignoring the whole mess all together. So I feel as if I've lost the only five best friends I ever had. But the person who makes everything fall apart is you. I can't believe I lost you. Luke...I miss you so much. And I'm scared.

I made a huge mistake. It didn't take me rubbing two rocks together over a stick to figure out how the fire starts. It was started up the day I met you on that plane. You saved me from a very horrid vacation. Instead, you gave me a gift. A very awesome summer vacation...that only really ended wrong. I wanted to be with you. Not David. YOU.

I refuse to let any other guys or even girls (on your behalf) stand in the way of us again. I want you. I need you. Please, will you forgive me?

Forever and Always,
-Kat

P.S.
In case I didn't make this clear enough: I'm in love with you and I want you to take me back because I'm an idiot. A HUGE idiot.