It is the year three thousand, and the Earth is totally different from what it was a thousand years ago. Humans now only exist in remote villages that are well hidden from their insect overlords.
The planet is covered in one huge jungle that feeds on an oxygen rich atmosphere that had developed when an experimental oxygen pod—that was meant for space trave exploded. The pod had malfunction and had created a strange radiation that had an immediate effect on the insects. The reason for not affecting the humans the same way was unknown. Some say it was because; the mutation lays sleeping in their genes.
Within a few years of the accident, the bugs had grown to a gigantic size; reach up to hundreds of feet. The humans had fought against these new giant monsters, but since they could multiply so fast, the nation’s armies were soon decimated by the giant insects, and civilization itself would soon follow. Humanity was believed to spend its remaining days hiding in fear of its new overlords. As humanity seemed to be holding by a string, a new breed of human begins to evolve, they were known as the Insecto Sapiens.
The Insecto Sapiens were known as insect warriors. They have a regular internal skeleton, but they also have an external skeleton. Their skin had formed into an exoskeleton that was as hard as steel, but as flexible as normal skin would be. They were also capable of moving objects many time their weight, and stand around 10ft tall. How their existence came to be was disputed, some said they were born with a mutagen in their genes, others say they were experiment of a mad scientist. One thing was certain they would help humanity stand a better chance of survival or spell its demise. It still remained uncertain if they were enough to turn the tide against the insect overlords.
Author notes
“I’m going to use my imagination, or die trying”
A contest entry
- Pay it Forward, you know you love them! by HeartSxAnDxStripeS.
580 points, ended August 28, 2007, 13 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - QUICKIE! Only open for a few hours! VERY easy! by Kevan.
225 points, ended October 26, 2007, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Interesting...
It seems to be a very intriguing and imaginative science fiction, and I really think you could go far with this idea if you wanted to. This kind of reminds me of a book I read once, where a giant ant was terrorizing the city. It's different, but was still a good book. Anyways, for now I will wish you the best of luck in my contest. Keep writing!
xxx
-Kevan -
You have a wonderful plotline here. I like you stated the problem.
You did a lot of telling to the reader; instead show the reader your new world. Let the reader taste, touch, see, hear, and smell.
Show a bug attacking a human, show the struggle of the humans...
Keep on writing!
Lynnplot: 5.
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watch using had unnecessarily ...
a couple of examples...
and the Earth is totally different from what it had a thousand years ago
here I think you meant to use "was" instead of "had"
and
The pod had malfunction and had created a strange radiation that had an immediate effect on the insects
if you went like ....
The pod malfunction and created a strange radiation that caused an immediate effect on the insects
Within a few years of this happening
couple things with this paragraph.
1st comma after happening
2nd you use "humanity" or a version of it repeatedly. rewording could enhance what you're trying to show here.
You skip tenses I'm not sure which you're trying to write in so I'm not sure which suggestions to make.
The idea reminds me of a movie I saw once ... I can't remember the name of it but it was about mutant bugs. I like these kinds of stories. If you continue this, I'd be interested in keeping up with it. Good piece, keep up the good work
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you discribing them, I can 'See' these giant ants or worse. I can 'See' forest so thick with greenry, you must cut your way through.
It is the year three thousand, and the Earth is totally different from what it had (been) a thousand years ago.
Humans now only exist in remote villages that are well hidden from their insect overlords. The planet is covered in one giant jungle that feeds on the oxygen rich atmosphere) This is a terrific opening into a very scary Science Fiction novel.
Without you discribing them, I can 'See' these giant ants or worse. I can 'See' forest so thick with greenry, you must cut your way through.
But from here on the narrator starts explaining a lot of environmental changes caused by technology. It is unlikely that humans, having reverted to a simpler way of life, would remember any of this. So who is this narrator—smile.
I think the plot is great and would love to see you develop it. Right now you have a very good outline. If you create some interesting characters both human and insect you can build a plot around their lives; and interaction between the species will make a heck of a story.
Geri
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I liked it, it was great and intresting. I really want to read more now and see what happens. It was a very intresting piece and I really enjoyed reading it. A very well done and good luck.
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Glad you like it, I'm currently working on the second part.
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Pretty good start, I like the idea of the Insecto Sapiens. But I would've made them side with both the insects and the humans, just because they are a combination of the two so it would seem to me like some would not choose to side with the humans.
"The planet is covered in one giant jungle that feed on the oxygen rich atmosphere that had developed when an experimental oxygen pod, that was meant for space travel exploded." Would be better written as: "The planet is covered in one giant jungle that feeds on the oxygen rich atmosphere that had developed when an experimental oxygen pod—which had been meant for space travel—exploded."
"The pod With in a few years of this happening the bugs had grown to gigantic sizes, some reaching 100ft long," I'm going to assume that "The pod" is a mistake, as well as the comma. Also "With in" should be "Within" and you should write out "one hundred feet."
"The humans had fought against these new giant monsters, but since they could multiply so fast. The nation’s armies were son decimated by the giant insects, and civilization would soon follow." This should be one sentence, with a comma in the middle. And "son" should be "soon"
Other than that, it seems like there should have been more paragraphs. I don't mean that there should've been more to the story, just that you should split these two paragraphs into more paragraphs. You could also be more descriptive with more paragraphs.
Good luck in the contest -
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I will be sure to fix those errors that you point out.
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Hmm, sounds interesting, slightly cliche'd, but interesting. I'd reccomend trying to find some other way to have huge insects, because an addage of oxygen would kill all humans, too.
Good luck in the PIF contest! (I entered, too)
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I changed it so were the pod created a mutation instead of oxygen that had an instants affect on the insects and a mutation that would lie dormant in the humans for nearly one thousand here, in one of their genes.
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