Letters To Santa

Dear Santa , 1

I've wanted an ark to play with for so long. And what about all those animals inside it? I've wanted one for so many years. Please give one to me, Santa. 2

From, 3

4

Toby
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Dear Toby,

Guess what? Since tonight is Christmas, I'll come and flood your house. Then I'll give you an ark and you can watch all the animals drown. You can have all the arks you want! *happy*
With extra special love , 5

Santa 6

- - - - -
Dear Santa, 7

I've always wanted a Wal-Mart membership card. So I can shop limitlessly. Please give this to me. 8

Love, 9

Mother of the Hawthorne Children 10

 - - - - -
Dear Mother of the Hawthorne Children, 11

I'll give you a Wal-Mart membership card. Just remember, all that they sell there is crap. Anything else you want to buy will be considered a privilege, and I will be happily obliged not to give it to you.12

Many kisses and sneaky looks at your butt,

Santa

Author notes

I'll add more once I make up more funny letters. Lol. I got inspired to write these from Deathwishes profile, when she posted that funny Santa letter. LOL If you have any to add, please message and I'll add them under your name.

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