Being Brave Isn't All It's Cracked Up To Be

I grew up in a small town. It was quiet, and calm. There hadn't been anything bad happening in my neighborhood for years. I made friends quick all the time, and I loved dares. Anytime someone dared me, I was almost happy to oblige them and prove them wrong.

One time, somebody dared me to jump off my house roof. Did I back down? I jumped. I broke my leg, but I still jumped. I was also notorious for getting in trouble. I loved to fight. It was fun. I was only thirteen, you do a lot of stupid stuff when your thirteen.

As a kid I grew up believing that this two hundred year old mansion, was haunted. At night the lights would flicker on and off. In the daytime no scrap of human existence could be found. The house itself was a terror. The shingles on the roof had begun to fall off years ago. The paint was so old and chipped that you could see the original wood beneath it. My friends and I would love to go over to the old rickety fence which surrounded the mansion, we'd peer through and then chuck rocks over and break the windows.

People said that a lord and his family used to live in the mansion. They all the sudden just up and left. But people always said the house could never be sold because it was a landmark.

Saturday night I looked out my bedroom window and saw that the lights had been turned on again.

"Who turns those lights on?" I wondered aloud. Well, being a boy, I knew that this could only be solved by actually going to the house, and seeing what was going on.

I decided to call my friends and have a stakeout. And let me tell you, stakeouts have nothing to do with steak. Though I wish they did.

My friends finally arrived at 12:30AM. Billy drug his younger brother along with him. His name was Marty, he never hung out with us. Sancho was our Brainiac, if you had math homework that needed done, he'd do it. And of course, I was our master planner. Mister Daredevil they called me at school.


"Okay Gabe.." Billy began, "It's time for us to check out this house."

"Isn't this kinda dangerous?" squeaked Marty.

"Quiet," Billy snapped, "I only brought him with me so he wouldn't tell Mom."

I sighed and turned to leave, "Come on.." I said signaling them to follow.

The four us walked down our street towards the old mansion. Coming to the fence we knelt down, I peered over. The house looked even worse at night. Shutters were hanging off, the grass was completely dead. All that was left was dirt. The door itself was completely off. Suddenly the lights flickered on and off, then the house stayed dark.

"Okay Gabe..Go and check it out!" Billy said giving me a nudge.

"No way!" I snapped.

"Come on! You're the one who called us here. You go in first!"

"No, we're all going inside!"

"I dare you to go in!" Billy then shouted.

I looked at him, I had never turned down a dare. No matter how crazy.

"Fine, but I dare you to follow!" I snickered. Billy nodded and looked to Sancho. He nodded as well.

I stood and walked towards the front door. I peered in looking into the pitch black. Entering the house I noticed that the inside was much better looking than the outside. A suddenly felt a cold chill go past me, I turned to look. I was alone. I had felt something brush up against me. What had it been?

Suddenly, a swirl of wind circled around me and chairs began flying towards me. I heard cracking. The windows were about to burst! I ran inside trying to... shattered glass! I ducked over by a nearby table. The wind was getting stronger and stronger. Suddenly, some chairs from the corner came flying at me. It looked like someone just picked them up and threw them. I dodged the first one, but when I looked back, one hit me right in the chest. I felt the wind get knocked out of me. I landed flat on my back, I waited impatiently for my breath to return. I was in a panic, there were chairs flying all over. Lamps were crashing and banging about. I rolled over onto my stomach.

"Billy!!" I yelled, managing enough air to call out.

Billy and Sancho came running in, but they got pummeled by the chairs too. They were sent flying, and landed beside the staircase.

"Come on, up the stairs!" Sancho yelled. Billy and I followed, going up the stairs the thought that we were safe was proved wrong .

At first we just heard the stairs creak, like normal stairs would. But then they started to simply, disappear. We ran for our lives, giving a final hurdle towards the top landing. There were no more stairs. Billy ran to a nearby window,

"Marty are you okay?" he shouted. I heard Marty's faint reply, "I'm fine, are you?"

Billy sighed, "Marty I want you to go home! Don't tell or you'll regret it!" he shouted out the window.
"Come on, let's find a way out of here." Billy said.

I searched the rooms looking for another exit, there was none.

Inside the room I saw two beds, coming closer I noticed there were also two bodies. One in each bed. I felt a rush of sadness come over me. They were children's bodies, I gasped and backed up. I hit the wall with a thud. Billy called out to me, I poked my head out the door. "I'm alright.." I mumbled. I exited the room.

There was another room at the end of the hall, I looked there too. Another body lay in the bed, while the other hung from the ceiling. Billy and Sancho joined me.

"What do you think happened?" I asked.
"They died, what else." Billy said without thinking.

Sancho coughed, "Well, looking at the evidence. The Person who hung himself could have killed the others and then killed himself. Guilt Death. Or someone could have done this to them. That would have been murder!"

He sounded serious, was he? Did someone actually murder these people?

I then heard a voice, that was so calming and so angelic.

"You young boys shouldn't be here," the voice whispered. I looked for the source, "We came to prove that this house isn't haunted!" I said bravely.

"You shouldn't have..now you're all going to die."

Fear came quickly, "I'm Going to die?" I questioned. "What happened here?"

"We were murdered. A long, long time ago." she said in a sing song tone.

"Why?" I asked. "Because we loved each other. And he didn't love us."

"You can't scare me.." I stated. Billy and Sancho looked at me like I was an idiot.

"Fine, have it your way." the voice than spoke with a much angrier tone.

I heard then just a short scream and then a long bone cracking scream. Turning to look back I saw the headless corpse of Billy, lying on the floor. Blood pooled around his neck. Sancho was the screamer, but soon he too suffered the same fate. Blood sprayed towards me, I turned my back to avoid it. I dared not turn back. I ran down the hall to the stairway, looking down onto the first floor. My mind told me I could make it, but my heart told me no. I searched for some way to get out. I heard cackles all around me,

"You can't get out, " said the first.
"If we were alive, we'd eat you!" another sang bitterly.

"Yes I can!" I shouted. I backed up and began to run towards the stair. I figured if I got enough speed I could just fly out the front door. So being me, I dared myself. So I jumped. You wouldn't believe what free falling is like, feeling the rushing air flowing past you.

Of course, I never made it to the first floor. Just as I had jumped, I was beheaded. The only thing I felt was wind at my neck. And then after that I was just sitting on the floor.

My body fell lifeless, but my mind never made it.

Looking around all I could see was my headless body next to me. I couldn't cry, I couldn't laugh. All I felt was extreme anger. Hate, fear, pain and sadness crowded me.

I became a Vengeful spirit, and as such I was left to watch as my parents, Sancho's parents and Billy's Parents called the police. They searched everywhere. They hung posters, each containing our pictures. And describing us. I watched over the months. And little by little they started to give up. No one ever thought to look in the haunted house.

Of course, why would they? We had never said anything about going there. We never got caught breaking the windows. This was a penance I guess.
Who knows why I was the only one. But I was, I was the only one of my three friends to be sentenced to watch the world go by.


In the end, No matter how hard we want them to be, some things are better left unexplained.

Author notes

happy halloween

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6
  • Jinxgirl
    October 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is interesting, but it could be better if you fleshed out the characters and expanded the story. also you did not follow some of the rules, if you will look you will see what i mean.


  • hey incendiary
    September 23, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Punctuation is off-putting. Haunted house? I've heard it too much. I couldn't get into it.


  • Token Massacre silver member
    September 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    It has missing punctuation(mostly missing commas)

    Billy sighed, "Marty I want you to go home! Don't tell or you'll regret it!" he shouted out the window.
    "Come on, let's find a way out of here." Billy said.

    you use too many he said's here
    try something like...
    Billy sighed. "Marty I want you to go home! Don't tell or you'll regret it!" he shouted out the window. Come on, let's find a way out of here."

    watch sentence fragments...
    I jumped. I broke my leg, but I still jumped.
    if you try something like...
    I jumped, breaking my leg but I still jumped.

    that also fixes the I thing you had going on.

    Interesting idea, one I've seen before. You describe the scene and personalities well. the appearances could have used a bit more details. This was a good start. Thanks for entering and good luck


  • MoonRoseWolf gold member
    August 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    There are a few grammer and spalling mistakes, but these are nothing major.
    The story itself is really good, and I actually got a chill up my back when I read the part where the 'calm, angelic' voice begins talking to them lol!
    I like the way it turns out even if it is an unhappy ending, because it leaves it open for if you wanted to continue a bit more with the story. Overall, This was good, and I really enjoyed it. Good luck in the contest!


  • Forgotten Anomaly
    August 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The idea wasn't tarably origonal, but i did not expect them do die. uasuly they get out like seconds before their deaths.


  • Gary Alexander silver member
    August 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Don't leave disparaging NOTES!

    One quick comment...although I haven't read the entire piece. It isn't a great idea to end with a line that echos your title. One of the other. If you use the last line...change the title. If you want the title...lose the last line. Incidentally, the overall technical writing of your is improving...but the overall plot of this story stretches credibility a little. No?
    And do yourself a favor...don't leave a note saying "this story sucks!" That isn't going to do anyone any good. Certainly not yourself. INSTEAD of that...if you really feel this way...simply don't post it! Work on it! (Jeez!)(lol!)
    G

1 - 6 of 6