Lovergirl03279• Show stories

Hey, I'm Cat and I'm new here. I am sixteen, and I am a junior in high school. I'm not usually very social (although I have been dating this one guy for a year), but I love to make new online friends. I am signed up with a couple of other fan sites:

www.fanfiction.net/~empresscarolineoftamaran

www.fictionpress.com/~lilmisscaroline

I don't consider myself much of a writer because singing is more my thing. I want to be a professional singer when I graduate high school and possibly go to college for music study.

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Favorite Quotes (there's a lot):

"I like potatoes!" -- my friend Tim

The songs of the dead are the lamentations of the living. -- Eragon, Eldest

"Hey kids! Lets get crackin'!" -- my friend Nicole

"Barges?" cried the cobbler. "Barges? We don't want no stinkin' barges!" -- Loring, Eldest

If "con" is the opposite of "pro", then would "Congress" be the opposite of "Progress"? -- WOKQ radio station

If the world gives you lemons, you could make lemonade. Or you could breed a new airborn pathogenic virus that will wipe out the planet, which is a lot cooler. --My friend Jen

Saying guns kill people is like blaming spelling mistakes on your pencil. -- my cousin's friend Coulter

Chuck Norris is the Messiah! --Ben T., a kid at school

"Why do people color bras if nobody ever sees them? Same thing with underwear!" -- my little sister, Emily

Is there an after-life? Of course! Tons of people live after your life! -- my boyfriend

"DADDY! You're back from Peru! We were afraid you'd been run over by an elevator!" --Bugs Bunny

"Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pac Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive music." -- Marcus Brigstocke

Davis: Wow, there are a least one hundred of them!
Yolei: Wow, you counted that high without taking off your shoes and socks. -- Digimon

TK: Wow, look at this land of fire! It's like the movie "Land of Fire!"
Yolei: I know. -- Digimon

Tai: You're late.
Davis: Sorry, Tai, don't blame Kari. It's my fault. I had a hair appointment today, but I looked in the mirror and decided my hair was great as it is!
TK: The problem was he stood looking in the mirror for over an hour.
Tai: What about Agumon?
Davis: Have him make his own appointment. -- Digimon

Davis: Since it's my coin, I get to call it. Tails I get to go rescue Kari, heads you do. (flips the coin) Tails! I'll tell her you were worried about her and that...hey!
TK: Ha, a coin with tails on both sides. That's how I used to beat Matt. Let's both go.
Davis: You really used to beat Matt like that?
TK: Yeah, that's how I got all my baseball cards and Matt's old guitar.
Patamon: Davis and TK sure argue a lot. I wonder why.
Veemon: Something about Kari. Human girls can make human boys act like that. -- Digimon

We're going to be stuck here forever! I'm never grow up, have kids, get married, make millions on the stock market... -- Yolei, Digimon

Cody: London, what's twelve times twelve?
London: ...a math question? -- The Suite Life of Zack and Cody

Lunesta is Latin for "2x4 upside the head". -- my dad

Danny: Joey, get up here in the attic! We have an emergency!
Joey: What kind of emergency?
Jesse: None of your business! Just get up here! -- Full House

This is weirder than a three-eyed billy-goat in the back of a flatbed truck in the middle of Manhattan. -- Robbie Ray Cyrus, Hannah Montana

Sometimes you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun. -- Robin Williams

I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself, and I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. -- Muriel Strode

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die. -- Mel Brooks

A lady came up to me on the street and pointed to my suede jacket. "You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?" she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, "I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too." -- Jake Johanson

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas, how he got in my pajamas I'll never know. -- Groucho Marx

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a- *****. -- Jack Nicholson

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number? -- Robin Williams

Everything in this room is edible. Even I'M edible. But that children, is called cannibalism. -- Johnny Depp

When you're not looking at it, this sentence is in Spanish. -- Douglas R. Hofstadter

I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information. -- Bill Watterson

I have plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it. -- Bill Watterson

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die. -- Bill Watterson

Excuse me, sir. Seeing as how the V.P. is such a V.I.P., shouldn't we keep the P.C. on the Q.T.? 'cause if it leaks to the V.C. he could become a M.I.A. and then we'd all be put out on K.P. -- Robin Williams

If one day you happen to wake up and find yourself in an existential quandry, full of loathing and self-doubt and wracked with the pain and isolation of your pitiful meaningless existence, at least you can take a small bit of comfort in knowing that somewhere out there in this crazy ol' mixed-up universe of ours, there's still a little place... called Albuquerque. -- Weird Al Yankovich

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Actual Consumer Labels:

Hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

Bag of candy: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Bar of soap: Use like regular soap.

Dessert (bottom of box): Do not turn upside down.

Chainsaw: Warning--Do not attempt to stop chainsaw with hands.

Keyboard: Warning--To reduce possibilities of fatal injuries, please read instructions manual.

Children's Cough Medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery after consuming.

Child's Superman Costume: Warning-Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.

American Airlines Packet of Peanuts: Instructions-Open bag, eat nuts.

American Airlines Packet of Peanuts: WARNING: May contain nuts.

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When You Dial a Mental Hospital:

Ring...Ring...

Welcome to Psychiatric World. If you are obsessive-complusive, please press 1 repeatedly.

If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2.

If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the phone so we can trace the call.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and the little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.

If you are delusional and hallucinate, please be aware that the thing you are holding on the side of your head is alive and about to bite off your ear.

(I hope I didn't offend anybody with tthis, and if it did, then I'm sorry.)

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(V)
(O.o)
( )
/_\
Copy the bunny to your presentation to help him achieve world domination, and come join the dark side. (We have cookies.)

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My name is Chris
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I werent ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I cant do a wrong
I cant speak at all
Or else im locked up
All day long.
When im awake im all alone
The house is dark
My folks arent home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe ill just get
One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Chariles bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
Im so afraid now
I starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door
Hes already locked it
And i start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"Im sorry!", I scream
But its now much to late
His face has been twisted
Into a unimaginable shape
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While i lay there motionless
Brawled on the floor
My name is Chris
I am three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me
And you can help
Sickens me top the soul,
And if you read this
and dont pass it on
I pray for your forgivness
Because you would have to be
One heartless person
To not be effected
By this Poem
And because u r effected,
Do something about it!
So all i ask you to do
Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE!

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-*-My name is Lauren and I Am Thirteen-*-
-*by Xelgaroth*-

My name is Lauren and I am thirteen,
and today I was used... like a simple machine...
They grabbed me and beat me and kicked me for fun;
I woke up half dead when it was all said and done...

My name is Lauren and I am thirteen,
and today I was used... like a simple machine...
They stripped me and hit me and thrusted some more,
by the same guys that I used to adore...

My name is Lauren and I am thirteen,
and today I was used... like a simple machine...
I don't think they meant to hurt me this way...
maybe if I let them, they might go away...

My name is Lauren and I am thirteen,
and today I was used... like a simple machine...
It was probably my fault... wasn't pretty enough...
Yes... that's why they were being so rough...

My name is Lauren and I am thirteen,
and today I was used... like a simple machine...
They said they were sorry; wouldn't happen again...
all I should do is give in to them...

My name is Lauren and I am thirteen,
Today, I was the center of a rape scene...

POST THIS ON YOUR PAGE IF YOU ARE AGAINST ANY FORM OF VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN!!!! THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR ABUSE!!!

(Thanks to AngelOfDepression for the above two poems)