Story of My Life

So, it's Saturday night and here I am, at home and alone. I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this, but I know one thing's for sure. I'm lonely and depressed...

It all started when I suddenly discovered my newfound obssession with the band Fallout Boy. I never used to like them then I heard a song and now I'm hooked. And, to add insult to my pathetic-ness, I am in love with the lead singer's voice. So I did a little research about the band (something I do when I like a band, learning about how and when and where they got started), and for some odd reason, now I am infatuated with Patrick Stump. I've been like this for the past few days and I know it's sort of dumb. But today, I had this moment of realization where no matter how much I think Patrick is cute or like his voice or what have you, I'd have a better chance at being a lonely spinster than to ever meet him, or any other guy I've been infatuated with for that matter. It's kind of sad really. I mean, I know that I truly know nothing about this guy and well, he's famous, so I mean, what kind of a chance would I really have to meet this guy ever? But see, this is where I become depressed. The media makes these people seem like untouchables when in reality, they were once regular joes just like the rest of us. I mean at least I would have had a chance (even if slim) to meet them, maybe actually gotten to know them. God, do I sound pathetic or what? I don't know, maybe I'm just going through this lonely phase and I have this belief that there aren't any decent guys left in Missouri. And sadly, it seems easier to fall in love with people that I'm never going to meet. One because they can't hurt me; two, since I don't know who they really are, they are who I imagine them to be; three, they seem a lot better than the guys I've dated or the guys that have flirted with me here in MO (yes, that was a direct stab at this manwhore at work who keeps flirting with me because he thinks he can get me into bed). Everyone kind of ignores me and tells me to hold on, because a nice guy, or Mr. Right may come along, but I am so sick of hearing that. What's so wrong with me wanting to believe I could meet Patrick or someone of the like? Why can't I? And why does everyone seem to think that telling me it's ridiculous and hold on, Mr. Right will come along will comfort me?! I appreciate the positivity but it's so frustrating, especially when everyone around you is involved with someone. UGH! I need a new hobby, writing doesn't seem to be cutting it. I mean, I have this great idea for a story, but instead of sitting my butt down and working on it, I'm sitting here, typing this. What is wrong with me?! ARGH! I think I'm just going to get off here and go read a book and go to bed. I mean, hell, I'm not doing anything tonight, so what does it matter? I'll be back when I have a more significant piece to post.