I comment almost exclusively on the poems entered in my contests. I find it easier than going out and trying to find good poems to read. That is why I hold a lot of contests, and quite frankly, as a contest holder, I don‘t feel I have to invest emotionally in every poem I read. I judge the poems on their poetic value, not their emotional quality. Now, often, the two things are synonymous, but not always. Yesterday, while reading contest entries, I came across a poem that was very well written, but as I read, I found a typo in it, and I pointed it out in my comment. I also acknowledged that there was a lot of pain in the piece, and thanked the person for entering. I would paste what I wrote word for word, but the comment I made was deleted. Anyway, the person replied with this:
yes I have.. and you picked out the grammatical error? You have no idea what
it takes for some of us to put our lives out here in poetry do you? You missed
the whole thing with me. why not shut down and write a little yourself.
Now, as I said, the poem was very well written, so I know that I did not make any negative remark on it. I only pointed out the typo. I don’t know what this person was expecting in a comment, but if you enter a poem into a contest that has typos or other grammatical errors, you should expect the judge to make you aware of them. If they don’t, then they are a lousy judge in my opinion. I honestly do not want to get emotionally invested in every poem I read. Who has the energy for that? I am not commenting in order to heal people’s inner child. My comments can’t exorcise someone’s demons, or expunge a lifetime of pain.
Apparently, I did not give this person what she needed in my comment. What I find strange about this person’s reply is that she tries to tell me that I don’t know what it takes for people to post their lives in poetry. I have posted over 170 poems on this site, each of them another piece of me laid out openly. Hell, I published an autobiography that splays me raw for the world to see. That is what writers do, we crack ourselves open and spread our souls on the page. Don’t tell me that I don’t know what it is like to post my life online. I do it willingly. I may find the act of writing cathartic for my own dysfunctional psyche, but I certainly don’t expect people to give me therapy in their comments.
I am not a Psychiatrist by Danna HobartEdit
- by Danna Hobart
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- on Jan 27 2009 11:37 PM, Jan 27, 2009, last seen on Apr 10
- © All rights reserved.
- A 36 year old girl from United States
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- You are one of the few poets on here who give valuable comments when they judge. You've helped me as a writer, and if I get a positive response from you, I know it means something.
- You have a strong point there, Danna. Some people are very sensitive, and are not open to constructive criticism. That's bad, because they are missing opportunities to improve their writing. I bet that what this person wrote was quite good, but sometimes typos can distract you from the reading. A typo can happen to anyone, specially if you are writing fast and forget to use the ''check spelling'' tool. So, don't worry about it.
- I wouldnt worry about it. People are people and they exist mainly to hurt eachother. Just keep doing what your doing and let the rest deal with itself.
- Danna you are a wonderful contest host. Every time I've entered one of your contests, I've come away with a great experience. Maybe I missed something or had an awkward line, etc. and because you took the time to actually read it and point out those places, not just day nice job thanks for entering, I was able to take your comment and improve the piece. Sure it's nice to hear 'this is beautiful' but I'd rather hear what could possibly make it outstanding. Thanks for being who you are! don't let the few who really don't get what writing and critiquing is all about get you down hon
Many blessings, Sandi - Perhaps they just had a tender spot. We never know what we are going to get when we comment. I am probably the Pollyanna or Mary Poppins of commenting. I see value in most everything and even sometimes assume that a grammatical error was intended and I still occasionally get the person who thinks that since I noticed what they actually wrote rather than just scrawling some generic "omg this iz soooo gud" that may mean I didnt even read their poem, I am insensitive to their "needs"
You just have to keep doing the next right thing. It isnt like you are actually ugly with your comments. And you are always even willing to discuss a comment with someone if they ask you what you meant. Heck, you are the person that got me looking to see if I could drop some of the "ing" words from my poetry and it has made a world of difference.
I have gotten truly rude comments from folks before that actually did nothing to help me improve my work in the eyes of the reader. None of those was ever from you
Even when you are critical, you let a person know the details of the criticism and offer a solution.
What more could a growing writer ask for besides a lot of money or something
Good point to vent about
I'm here to learn. I want to be critiqued, I appreciate it. I'm planning on taking the the punctuation and grammer class that's offered here, because I just discovered that you don't punctuate poetry the same as you would prose or an essay. It's been 30 yrs since high school, and 10 since my last degree and I had to write technical papers for that degree. I wondered when I graduated if I had a creative bone left in my body.
Like one of the previous comments, sometimes the younger one is causes one to be less able to accept constructive critisism. When I signed up here on Christmas Day it was my Christmas present of learning to myself. We all need an Attitued of Gratitude for what we learn from each other here on these pages. It's full of all ages and diversity, we are blessed. And bless you for doing all the contests you do!! - I think education should be an ongoing process for everybody. I value knowledge above everything else. People who shut themselves off from learning just puzzle me. Let me know how you like the writing classes.
- i used to be like that. and occasionally i do, just like lash out about what i've written but only its very personal. but there are certain people that can't take some criticism...and it takes a lot to do that the younger you are because you would think the older you get, you'd understand that no one is trying to knock your work. but not everyone gets that
- well stated...
- This is a brilliant point. I remember once reading a poem in one of my contests which was a stream of thought really, no "poetry" in it. I pointed this out by suggesting imagary, and got a message telling me I was cold and careless etc.
You're a good judge, indeed - This happens to me all the time! I can't believe the number of people who simply write down their opinion on a subject, put it in short lines and call it a poem. Some of them are more like essays than poetry. Others think that this website is here as a forum to preach to people. I am actually offended when someone uses a faux poem as their podium and tries to tell me what I should be thinking or doing. On the other hand, if you are a good enough poet, you can accomplish the same thing, and a person will not feel condescended to, chastised or lectured.
I agree with almost all of this article, Danna.
I make many typos myself and use the ABC check in my Google bar to help. I appreciate mistakes being pointed out so that I can edit them in my poem if necessary. I also point out such mistakes in the poems of others who usually appreciate them. I do think spelling mistakes make the poem 'worse.'
I acknowledge that emotion is a major part in many poems. Wordsworth said that to make the reader feel the emotion of the poet should be an aim when writing a poem. But, I know what you mean about playing 'psychiatrist." That is not the reason I put emotion in my poem.
I entered one of your contests previously but I did not seem to make the grade. I felt that the comments meant I had a lot of improvement to do before I try again. That, as you say, is me being open. I must try again soon.
Richard
- I wish everyone could see things the way you do.
A lot of times my comments are blunt, I won't deny that. I may be the Simon Cowell of poetry. But even my bluntest comments are not said with malice. More than once, someone has gotten upset over a comment that I thought was perfectly benign. I will take half of the responsibility for that, but I can not control the frame of mind someone is in when they read the comment. Often people interject spite where there was none. Ironically, there are some comments I made where I was expecting a negative response back from the poet, but got a thanks instead. You just can't predict things around here.
I am always willing to help people improve their writing. Please let me know if I can help you in any way. Wholeheartedly agree
I totally agree with what you state here, I'd venture to say that all of us here leave a piece of ourselves in everything we write and post, if we didn't then our words would bear no importance even to ourselves. I personally dislike pieces riddled with spelling errors ( even one can stand out like a beacon and then to some degree the focus of the poem itself can be lost) and also the non-capitalisation of I when used in possessive form. Nobody's perfect and can get it right all the time and where I can I like to help the poet in their presentation of a piece by pointing these things out and on the occassion should I slip up on a similar error I appreciate it being drawn to my attention. I commend you for your stance as anyone who enters a contest should at least realise that the host is ultimately the one who decides what is deserving of their awards depending on their personal preferences in style and knowledge base, and each indiviual host will have entirely different expectations.- Thank you for bringing that up. I am always appreciative when someone lets me know I've made a typo or mispelled something. I certainly don't take it as a personal attack. And yes, every contest holder is different. That is what makes this place so great; there is a place for everyone.
- Ugh, I know how that goes. I actually do want to help the lost souls whenever I can, but sometimes it just gets repetitive. But hey, we should probably be used to it by now. I was once *harassed* by someone in a contest 'cause I didn't particularly like his poems (and I pointed out an entry was plagiarized). I remember once when I pointed out a couple grammatical errors/typos in a poem, I got a message from that person saying how if s/he changed the subject-predicate disagreements and/or the misused punctuation or typos, the poem would lose its "feeling"
Now how does *that* go? 
I find it worse when, as in your situation, they reply badly to even a *positive* comment. Ah well, not worth pondering that much, I guess. - Another thought that just occurred to me is when I first started posting poetry, I was hungry for critiques, actual critiques where people pointed out the weaknesses in my writing, because I wanted to be a better writer. At that time, I thought everyone wanted to be a better writer. I have come to realize that is not the case, but I will never understand these people who refuse to correct spelling and grammar errors because it would ruin the “feel” of the piece.
Some of the greatest poets broke all the rules of writing, but I believe you need to know and understand all those rules before you can get away with breaking them. - I know! That baffled me too!
It's somewhat understandable, especially for a mediocre poet but even for the better ones, to feel editing imagery or style might have an undesired effect on the feeling of a poem. But ... unintended typos and things like commas or grammar mistakes? Come on... what sentimental value do THOSE hold?
- That has happened to me too. Those kinds of people can not be reasoned with, so I don't even try anymore.
- I understand fully what you are saying. but i dont see it how you do. i hate my spelling being pointed out and i just gave up trying. i dont think spelling makes the poem worse or better, because after all we are human and are not programed to creat perfection.
- Klayer, I am a terrible speller. I make spelling mistakes all the time. I try to avoid them by typing my poetry in a word document and running spellcheck before i post them, but it happens anyway, and I get embarrassed when people point them out to me, but even though I get embarrassed, I am still thankful. Ultimately, we are judged by what we put out for the world to see. I will give you an example. One of my best friends has a very demanding job, and thus has no time to meet people, so she decided to try a computer dating service. She would not even reply to the men who did not at least make an attempt to use proper spelling and grammar. Unfortunately, forums such as this one have made many people lazy in the way we approach writing. It may not be expected of you now, but if you intend to go to college, your professors will expect you to write and spell proficiently. Computers make it easy. When I was in high school, I had to look things up in an actual paper dictionary
