~ Once There Were Two ~

Study of Twins, Loss and Grievance 1

Topic: Does a surviving twin feel bereavement differently than a sibling does in the death of a family member? 2

Articles under examination: Once There Were Two study of surviving twins in various stages of grief, and Bereavement in Children a study a different grieving levels of children. 3

The first article that was examined was Once There Were Two, by D.S. Barron. Twins are forever bounds together even in death are the consensus of this study. D.S. Barron interviewed the Lone Twin Network, a British group, whose twin siblings have died. The interviewed were conducted to gain better understanding of the nature of a twin's bond, or why its end should resemble exile. The first study and its findings of surviving twins in various stages of grief were also included in the article that was examined. Surveys and extensive interviews were given to over 300 surviving twins in various stages of grief. The subject's ages ranged from 18 to 92. The age of the surviving twins ranged from time of birth, childhood, or adulthood. The theory was twins developed the implications of being a twin, realizing the identity of being a twin, and the consequences of their loss had serious effects on them, as they grew older. In all the lengthy interviews Woodward conducted all who sought counseling for their bereavement, failed to find explanations or relief for their grief. Theorizing that twins feel profound dislocation, due to the depth one twin feels for another. This bond originates during pregnancy, before birth. Twins felt their loss strongly. The feelings of isolation grow worse as the twin grows older. The lone twin, even after years of their twin sibling's death, feel a profound deprivation that no one or anything could assuage. Many twins describe a constant and intense loneliness. 4

Knowing a bond stronger than any type I have felt before, and to lose that bond, would be very hard to deal with.  5

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In essence the surviving twin loses a part of themselves with their twin's death. I myself am a twin, and hope never to feel the pain and isolation of losing my identical twin sister. We have a bond unlike my other siblings, this bond has been strong for as long as I can remember, and living life without that bond, for me is just unthinkable. Although, I know losing a sibling or family member would be hard for any one, children learn to accept that lose, learn to live through their lose. Twins seem to become more troubled and isolated with age, all of the surviving twins that remembered their other twin, felt that as a whole were not complete, because of their lose. Dealing with the issue of death is a terrible thing for a child to experience, and those experiences may last a lifetime. 7

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