...just somehting that had to be said...

constantly that stupid quote thing replays through my head. 'you don't know what you have till its gone' well honestly i knew what i had and silly me.. didn't take an advantage

i hate the fact that you're happy..well scratch that because that's rude
i hate that you aren't happy with me. i sit in class for that stupid hour and
a half, and i can't help but think why did i let such a good thing go unnoticed.

and yesterday in the middle of my frustration i was comparing you and thinkingof everything that you've done for me. the only person that takes the time out to read my crud i call poetry. one of like 2 people that sympathizes my hate for gettingout of bed before everyone during marching season. idk you're just always there mentally and it's better than physically.

i doubt that the day you cracked my little shell and i told you everything..and i realized
how easy it was to do so... and i kinda don't want to replace that feeling with anyone else.surely to me you're perfection because duhh you put up with me. and idk why...and latelyi've just been on the verge of telling you something and there are sooooooooooooo manygood times..but damn it it's freakin scary, because every time i say it... the deal goes sour...and idw it to go sour this time...

the possibility of you knowing this is possible but i'm gonna make sure you don't forget itstarting now...or now..or when ever you read these sickening little words...

'i've fallen for my best friend'

Add your comment

    : Comment:

Recent Journals

  • distance+insecurity= me on a bad day.
    so if you don't know. i have boyfriend who is at marine bootcamp till october. 1 2 so anyway like an hour ago. i got a bad feeling in my tum-tum and i just clicked on his facebook. 3 no i know he's not a cheater, but i have had so my fudged up relationships that i'm unsusre of my own sanity. 4
    on Aug 8 9:17 PM, 200 words. → Make first comment?
  • but what you dont know is..
    so um, i just realized i suck at writing blogs. my mind is always completely moving and it never focuses on one complete thought at once. but like alot of the time my mind is stuck on him and how i constantly check my phone out of habit to see if he's called or texted me. or the fact that i'm always at the mailbox r
    on Jul 26 11:28 PM, 2,000 words. → Make first comment?
  • letter to the m.i.a
    1 dear you, 2 so i've been counting down the days tille you come back [88] and i'm so freaking i don't wanna say miserable but i also didn't know i was capable of missing you so much. i think while i was anticipating your departure i had put up this huge front of me missing you so much. but you know when i d
    on Jul 24 4:12 PM, 500 words. → Make first comment?
  • 90 days
    i had about 4 dreams about him today. which is unusual. 1 that's all i have to say. i just really need to hear from him or something.. 2 i didn't know that i'd miss hom this much. it's not normal. 3 maybe i'll post the dreams later... maybe
    on Jul 22 9:20 PM, 100 words. → Make first comment?
  • so long love.
    so today was the day my boyfriend shipped himself to california for 92 days aka 3months for marine bootcamp. it makes me sad. like unusually sad. i don't if it's because i got so close to him in the 5years of friend ship and 2months of dating. or maybe its because i really just love him more than i ever knew was pos
    on Jul 20 9:38 PM, 100 words. → Make first comment?
  • 1.20.09
    on Jan 20 2:10 PM, 100 words. → 2 comments, Add one?
  • things about him that make me happy [part 1]
    1. he bites me in the best and least sexual places 2. he pokes my nose; i think it makes him laugh. 3. he likes it when i laugh, even when i'm laughing through tears 4. electricity sparks between us when i kiss him. 5. we've kissed over 55times in one day alone 6. watching movies with him on my couch is better than
    on Jan 12 9:47 PM, 200 words. → 2 comments, Add one?