How was your day? Mine was eh, ok. Actually I always feel pretty lame finding fault with any day. Most days above ground sucking air definately beat the alternative. Some days seem to be more meaningful than others though. Or maybe it is just that I attach more meaning to some days than others.1
There was not actually anything wrong with today. No crisis or drama or anything. Sometimes I think I just mistake serentiy and peace for depression and boredom. I can remember a time when I would have paid to have a boring day.2
And there is the fact that I have so darn much to be grateful for. I talked to a woman today who has such bad asthma that she has a hard time even walking around the block when the humidity is high. The doctor didn't think she would live to be 3 years old. Still here she is trying to work out and do something to make herself healthier rather than just give into the illness.3
Sort of makes me feel ashamed and whiney, ya know?
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I am ashamed quite often as I have a fridge full of insulin and it sits there instead of being injected into my body.
Excellent Journal
Adding your comment:Recent Journals
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It's me. I know. The memory may be a little fuzzy because I am about as consistent as. oh, say "Thing-In-A-Bag". 1 "Thing-in-a-Bag" is a cat toy. Or, depending on the cat, a pet antagonist. Someone sent us one for a Christmas present to our cats once. Yes people sometimes send Christmas presents to cats. So
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Here we go. Always with the journals. 1 You know, I have an entire drawer full of journals. I love them. I think they are pretty. I buy them with the best of intentions and then they sit there year after year until the pages grow yellow with age and eventually they become fancy scrap paper. 2 It isn't likon Oct 4 9:20 PM, 400 words. → Make first comment?
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In the words of the infamous Disney Channel character London Tipton, "YAY ME!!" 1 Yes, I am truly as old as I am and still watching kid shows on The Disney Channel. I realize that most women my age are busy with more important TV like --insert soap here-- or truly educational TV like Daisy of Love, Rockon Jul 26 11:21 AM, In Whatever. 300 words. → 4 comments, Add one?
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Just do the possible. That is my goal for the day. Whatever is doable, I can do, right? How many times have I condemned myself because I felt I could not do everything perfectly? My normal reaction is if you can't do everything do nothing at all. Or worse, do just the opposite. Sometimes this mode of operationon Jan 23 8:15 AM, 200 words. → 1 comment, Add one?
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Now, back to my over analization of past events that have set me on my current path of feeling not so great about myself. In reality, journalling as a tool is not about over analyzing anything or finding some magic formula that will make everything in todays world perfect. For me it is simply about getting honest aon Jan 22 10:59 AM, In Addiction, Recovery, Self esteem, Solutions, Spiritual growth. 800 words. → 2 comments, Add one?
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Why is it that once I know that negative thinking is attempting a slip into I life, you don't just put up a gate with a lock on it and keep it out? Nooooooo, I seem to feed it instead. Even though I know. Even though I often recognize destructive thinking in its seed form, I still have tendency to water it andon Jan 21 8:51 AM, In Addiction, Recovery, Self esteem, Solutions, Spiritual growth. 700 words. → 1 comment, Add one?
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It started in August 2008. I had been working at a Curves for a year and I had gotten in the best shape I have been in since High School. I had found a workout that was do-able and that I could continue to intensify and feel good about in just 30 minutes. For those who are not familiar, Curves is designed for womeon Jan 20 8:59 AM, In Addiction, Recovery, Self esteem, Solutions, Spiritual growth. 500 words. → 1 comment, Add one?
