That's right, I have two friends.
Do I care? Yeah, I cry myself to sleep every night, thinking about how life would be so much better if I had fifty more friends to annoy me.
The two friends I have are all I need. I've known them for at least five years.
What usually ends up happening can be illustrated by a flow chart:
I meet someone.
We end up in a situation where I have no choice but to talk to them.
If the conversation is interesting, I dive into deeper subjects. If not, I feign interest and ask generic questions like “What's your minor?”
I get facebooked by the person, then receive no other form of contact (unless through work, school, etc.)
I become annoyed and bored by the person—because, hey, they aren't that interesting.
I begin making more and more snide/sarcastic comments on a no-regrets basis (you know, those things you just shouldn't say).
If all goes well, I can completely alienate the person, keeping them out of my life forever. If not, I have one more target for my sarcasm (I have a genetically inherited sarcastic quota).
In the end, everyone's happy. Well, I am at least.
So, there you have it. Not sure what else to say. It seems I tend to get along with people on SW better than RL people. I guess that's what I get for talking to a crowd of semi-intellectual writers, eh?
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