As another year comes to close, and sit bidding farewell of more passing days; I ponder the thoughts of where time has gone.
This has been a year that for the most part, I would forget in a heartbeat if I could. Unfortunately, a year ridden with more personal tragedy then I care to recount, but sending farewell greetings to a year gone by will at least close off the chapter of this cycle.
Right from the very start of the year, things weren't good. My grandmother, ill, was only given a month tops too live. She's a fighter, and held off almost the whole year. Passing to her final resting home on December 5th, she will always be in our hearts and soul. We love you grandma, I only wish mom could have seen you one more time.
And as February approached a closing, I awake to find my mother having a massive stroke. Leaving her in a coma for 8 days, I am blessed that she is physically here with us still, but so much has been lost from the ordeal. My mother is now a 4 year old child at most times, and plagued with hemiparalysis. No longer can she just get up and do the things she wishes, or even those that she is supposed to do. She is what help this family together, and somehow (oldest child here) I am now in that role. This has left us with nine people - three families - living in one home, just to provide the support each other needs. It can be utter chaos and strength all at the same time.
Because of my mother, my father is also falling apart, and this makes me worry. Can't handle them both being down, so once again, we try to hold it all together.
My sister had taken rather ill this year. And one of her sons became seriously injured. We cope, wemanage, but what we wouldn't give for just one small break. How we dream the coming year shows some mercy.
I myself took my own fall, left with a surgery that literally changes life a bit. Nothing that I can't get past, but just one more dent in the grand scheme of a passing year. Again, how I pray that 2009 sheds light to a passing darkness.
Don't get me wrong, not everything was all bad. For the first time in years, I have grown closer to my sister. We were forced to deal with each other in a different manner, and more than anything, she has become my best friend. In ways, she has taken that role of confidant and friend that my mother has always been. I am thankful that we have been brought closer, just wish it could have been under better circumstances. My son, single child, at least feels he sort of has brothers now, as my nephews are always here. But boy do they sometimes fight like siblings too, lol.
And best of all, this year has brought a smile to me amidst all the tragic moments that have passed. I have found my reason to smile, to look forward to future years, and to hope for dreams to come to fruition. In my heart, I have found love, and in that, I have found strength. and peace. I thank you for this, and for stepping into my life.
Of all the things that have come and gone this year, some will linger and some will pass. I wish not all of them had to linger, but they are who we are- who we have become, and so this is us. But I will carry with me, into the coming year, the bond I have created with my family, and the love I hold close to my heart. And all I can say is Best wishes for a better year filled with health and prosperity to all. Happy new Year!
Adding your comment: