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Trophies: 90 gold, 119 silver, 158 bronze, 550 HM, 10 courses.
8,129 comments, 11,222 on me, 105 contests, 12 columns, joined Jan 17, 2010
Visited on May 24

"Jesus loves you." "A nice gesture in church
but a terrible thing to hear in a Mexican prison."
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If you can't laugh at yourself have you any right to laugh at anyone else?

To all those that don't agree.

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CRITICS PLEASE NOTE..
I write what I think although I must admit
That sometimes I muddy the water a bit.
For those who do not like it the sanction is there
Switch off computer or
-off elsewhere
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The fact that no one understands you;
doesn't mean you are a poet for always
there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
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When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.
Live your life so that when you die, the world cries
and you rejoice." - Cherokee
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Even Before The Age Of the Motor Car Lord Byron was Mad,Bad & Dangerous

Which the Easter Bunny Soon Found Out
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I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians.
Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.
Mahatma Gandhi
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"It's a guid world, but they're ill that's in it"
(Creation is perfect, people are the problem)
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Everybody is ignorant--Only the subjects vary---(Will Rogers)
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Impartiality: is a pompous name for indifference,
which is an elegant name for ignorance.
G K Chesterton
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La ignorancia es atrevida.
Ignorance is courageous
.(Spanish Proverb)
-El mejor escribano echa un borrón
(The best scribe makes a blot)

BANKERS 
Bankers are mythological & insincere beings who subsist by feeding on the life essence (generally in the form of blood or money) of living creatures, regardless of whether they are dead or a living person/being. Although banker entities have been recorded in many cultures, and may go back to "historic times", the term banker was not popularized until the early 18th century, after an influx of banker superstition into Western Europe from areas where banker legends were frequent, such as the U.S.A and Eastern Europe, although local variants were also known by different names, such as Blood-suckers in Greece and leeches in Romania. This increased level of Banker superstition in Europe led to mass hysteria and in some cases resulted in countries actually being taxed and people being accused of Bastardisation.
VET-ALAS 
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http://www.nobodyhere.com/toren.hier Try this link ;
Be Warned it's addictive. --
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Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems
but, come to think of it, neither does milk
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"We come to love not by finding a perfect person,
but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly"
Sean Kean
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the grass may look greener on the other side,
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Pied Beauty
by Gerard Manley Hopkins
Glory be to God for dappled things —
For skies of couple-colour as a brinded cow;
For rose-moles all in stipple upon trout that swim;
Fresh-firecoal chestnut-falls; finches' wings;
Landscape plotted and pieced — fold, fallow, and plough;
And áll trádes, their gear and tackle and trim.
All things counter, original, spare, strange;
Whatever is fickle, freckled, (who knows how?)
With swift, slow; sweet, sour; adazzle, dim;
He fathers-forth whose beauty is past change:
Praise him.
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Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe. - Albert Einstein
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IF....
IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools.
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
by Rudyard Kipling.
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Killing your mother is matricide, killing your father is patricide, killing your kids, is justified!
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Never argue with an idiot....they will drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.
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I'm trying to see it from your point of view but i cant get my head that far up my ass
Please put this on your status
if you know someone who suffers from Rectal Cranial Inversion.
Rectal Cranial Inversion -
otherwise known as Asshat Syndrome
affects the lives of many.
There is still no known cure for Rectal Cranial Inversion,
but by posting this in our statuses we can raise awareness.
This cause is close to my heart,
sadly I meet many people who have been afflicted with it! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------
-
W. H. Davies Leisure
WHAT is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare?—
No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And stare as long as sheep and cows:
No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:
No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night:
No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance:
No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began?
A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

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Spell checker
You do have to be able to spell
or at a guess even try to that well
but a person must be a bit of a pecker
if he or she doesn't use the spell checker
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Come gather ye to celebrate the difference
Arrange and decorate the circumference.
Too large or too small its not your call
Things are as they are whether you like it or not
so lets accept to enjoy the variety we have got.
Why do people make a friend
and then start to re arrange them
Not every color in the box will blend
sometimes we need some contrasts
when strident trumpets blasts.
It's never too late to move from your comfort zone.
Be the one you've always been
and blossom on your royal throne
The way you want to be seen
There'll always be some one who'll be there to moan.
Hear ye hear ye the time has come
When we can beat on another drum.
Lets make some jazz and play by ear
You are the original one off creation
Queer or odd You'll out stare damnation.
Audrey Christophersen.
A Poem by one of my Favourites
Me in a nutshell
N N
U (m e) U
T T.
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Be Positive for in this life
we dont have time for care or strife.
For simply days will better be
with smiles, and some humility.
Peruse awhile in nature lest,
you can't do better than your best.
One of the great delights each day
fulfil your dreams in your own way,
Find time to see, in Beauty's grace,
the joy you find in each new face.
Start each day afresh and see,
just how great life can really be.
Be Positive for in this life
we dont have time for care or strife.
As he who thinks towards these ends
good luck with happiness attends.
Teddybard

You wanted a pen picture here I go
I tell the facts which I think you should know
Tall and myopic yet bald of the pate
was good enough for William Shakespeare
and will do for me, you've been told old mate.
Spotty and cross-eyed Girls, your worst ever date
don't do Drugs or Charity and I`m overweight
confidence, you can tell I've none to relate:
I don't smoke, cannabis - sadly makes me cough
Sign of trouble I either join in
r I`m off.
The last two dates or, well maybe three or four
Walked in, crossed the room and then ran out the door.
I`m not an ugly person but to appreciate me
you'll need a glass, maybe six of G and T.
Only my wife has each day stood by me
I`m not bad, or good , she knows I'm harmless see,
I'm the sole person who lives hereabout
immigrants complain to the council about.
I've only two known faults, all of this true
Everything I say,and all that I do
And just to make things seem well, even worse
a Midas touch
but in reverse.
I`ve told you all those truths I want to show.
more facts on me you'll never want to know
you've seen the points that you need to savour
you just would not want me as a neighbour.
Take it from me I`m no cutie
ugliness is better than beauty
Beauty fails and sometimes fast
Ugliness we Know will last.
Today's Short Reading >From The Bible ...
A Reading from Genesis
‘And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth. ’ Then he made the earth round ................ and he laughed and laughed and laughed


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Lord Teddybard Mikebike 57AD-
Renowned for his transformation skills (cuddly magician)
Loved to give female staff a shoot during their lunch break.
The Other Side of Teddybard.
Appears on "The Chronicles of Sir Mike Bike."
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