Parsley Kye• Show stories

Sometimes I wish I could just grab tragedy by the balls and let comedy have the entire floor. The world would be so much happier. Plus, just think about how funny it would be when we all died...

I can be goofy, I can be serious. I can make you laugh, I can make you cry. I can make you love me, I can make you hate me. I can be stupid, I can be smart. I can be helpful, I can be useless. I can be something, I can be nothing.
Get to know me, and I can be wonderful. Choose to ignore me, and I can be a pain.

“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?”
-Chris Rock

"Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain."
- Edward De Bono

"I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity."
-Chris Rock

"Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious."
-Peter Ustinov

"Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people."
-Robert Benchley

"Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?."
-Homer Simpson

"English - Who needs that? I'm never going to England!"
-Homer Simpson

"If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative."
- Woody Allen

"A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail, but your best friend is the one sitting next to you saying "that was f***ing awesome"