KillaCouture• Show stories

I can be wild, confident, fearless, private , low-key, philosophical,girlie, flirtatious, chill, friendly, and charming

The Joker : I believe whatever doesn't kill you simply makes you... stranger

The Joker : You know, I'll settle for his loved ones.
Gentleman at Party : We're not intimidated by thugs!
The Joker : [ as he smacks his lips ] You know, you remind me of my father.
[ pulls out his switchblade and brings it to the Gentleman's mouth ]
The Joker : I hated my father!
Rachel Dawes : [ off screen ] Okay, stop!
[ turns to face Rachel, tosses the Gentleman to his thugs and approaches Rachel, adjusting his hair with the knife ]
The Joker : Well, hello, beautiful. You must be Harvey's squeeze, hmm? And you *are* beautiful.
[ hovers around the incredibly nervous Rachel ]
The Joker : You look nervous. Is it the scars? You want to know how I got 'em?
[ grabs Rachel's head and positions the knife by her mouth ]
The Joker : Come here. Hey! Look at me. So I had a wife, beautiful, like you, who tells me I worry too much. Who tells me I ought to smile more. Who gambles and gets in deep with the sharks... look at me! One day, they carve her face. And we have no money for surgeries. She can't take it. I just want to see her smile again, hmm? I just want her to know that I don't care about the scars. So... I stick a razor in my mouth and do this...
[ mimics slicing his mouth open with his tongue ]
The Joker : ...to myself. And you know what? She can't stand the sight of me! She leaves. Now I see the funny side. Now I'm always smiling!
[ Rachel knees the Joker in the groin; he merely laughs it off ]
The Joker : A little fight in you. I like that.
Batman : Then you're going to love me.

[ stumbles out of wrecked truck ]
The Joker : [ to Batman ] Come on, I want you to do it, I want you to do it. Come on, hit me. *Hit me!*

Happy : So why do they call him "The Joker"?
Dopey : I heard he wears make-up.
Happy : Make-up?
Dopey : Yeah, to scare people. You know, war paint.

The Joker : Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. We are tonight's entertainment! I only have one question. Where is Harvey Dent?
[ nobody responds; The Joker walks around the room pointing with his shotgun at everyone ]
The Joker : You know where Harvey is? You know who he is?
[ grabs a man's face ]
The Joker : You know where I can find Harvey? I need to talk to him about something. Just something, a little.
[ turns the man's face away ]
The Joker : No...

The Joker : It's a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, do you know how I got these scars?
Batman : No! But I know how you got these!

The Joker : You just couldn't let me go could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You truly are incorruptible aren't you? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness, and I won't kill you, because you're just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever.
Batman : You'll be in a padded cell forever.
The Joker : Maybe we can share one. They'll be doubling up, the rate this city's inhabitants are losing their minds.

The Joker : [ to Det. Stephens ] Do you wanna know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick. You can't savor all the... little... emotions. In... you see, in their last moments, people show you who they really are. So in a way, I know your friends better than you ever did. Would you like to know which of them were cowards?

Batman : What did you do?
The Joker : I took Gotham's white knight, and brought him down to our level. It wasn't hard. Y'see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little... push.
[ laughs ]

The Joker : [ to Batman ] We really should stop fighting, we'll miss the fireworks!

The Joker : The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules!

The Joker : See, I'm a man of simple tastes. I like dynamite... and gunpowder... and gasoline! Do you know what all of these things have in common? They're cheap!

[ repeated line ]
The Joker : Wanna know how I got these scars?

The Joker : [ holding a knife inside Gambol's mouth ] Wanna know how I got these scars? My father was... a drinker. And a fiend. And one night he goes off crazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn't like that. Not. One. Bit. So, me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. Turns to me and he says "Why so serious?" Comes at me with the knife,"Why so serious?" He sticks the blade in my mouth. "Let’s put a smile on that face!" And... Why so serious?